Drosophila is a species of fly also known as the common fruit fly or the vinegar fly. So technically your superhero is fruit fly man. Now, that you have that image in your mind, I will tell you how much I love this story.

S.W.E.E.T ! 3 3 3 UR A GIFTED WRITER!

awe super cute! i really enjoyed that , good job:)

good job :)

nice story! I love the personality's of the two...maybe I should get an account so I can fave this. lol Nice job.

I've enjoyed reading this story. A power that can get the crumbs off the bed... that is a super power indeed :)

I loved your story it was good and you didn't drag it out like a lot of authors do. Happy Writing ~ Luckey

hey,

this story was really fun to read.

Liked it a lot. )

I think u meant telekinetic, yah not telekine. i love ur story with all it's amatuer fun. not that it's bad, it really good, the idea's nice. but u shouldn't have made them tell each other their powers so easily. just saying

AH! I loved it! it's so great! although it is a bit confusing when you switch up the words and use odd terms _ but that's okay cus you ROCK...

The opening paragraph: so true! Even at university level, one has need of time to acclimatize to the atmosphere of work. *grins*

Also it was rather nice how Sarah and Chris didn't shun Michael for talking with Scott. They could have reacted far more nastily, but in fact were quite friendly, which was sweet. At high school people are often shunned for standing out from the crowd so it was nice to see that this didn't happen here.

On a linguistic level, the first-person perspective continues to have its appeal and I think is more effective in this second chapter. It's more punchy and works better.

Something I meant to note in the prior review but forgot was that, as with HTTOTW, I like your name choices. I always find picking character names to be as hard or harder than the ever-infamous picking the story title; I like the choices you made.

First of all, I like the 1ps perspective that is offered, an interesting contrast to HTTOTW. Also the frankness of Michael, exemplified in a couple of places:

"Now he's got a better position and a higher salary. Though I didn't notice any change in the amount of my pocket money!"

and:

"I'm naturally good looking."

*approves*

Further down, you use more of this to great effect, at least IMO when you are relaying Michael's observations regarding Sarah and Chris' appearances. I liked that in particular.

The detail provides a clear picture of the scenario without being overbearing or obstructive to the flow of the story.

So overall, I'm enjoying this story so far. Onto Chapter 2...

Cookies! hehe. Scott should totally use his power for fun. I'm so glad there's a nice sweet ending like there is. It really is the icing on the cake. The yummy cake! This was a nice enjoyable read. Very much enjoyable!

Scott is cute with the showing off. And yay for Sarah and Anita! But now that means that Chris needs somebody! And Scott! He is such a good person for saving the boy. It would be unforgivable if he just stood by and did nothing when he has the power to help. But he did so yay! (Aw, I have to go to college so I can't finish reading this straight away :( )

They are so cute together! And saying 'I love you!' Sweet stories like this are why I love reading so much! They make me smile and give me nice happy feelings inside :)