Reviews for Circles of Arven
VelvetyCheerio chapter 32 . 12/28/2008
That was a rather long chapter, but I enjoyed reading it. I was a little surprised that the villagers didn't run away screaming in fear though. Hmm. Well, I'll see to the next chapter, then.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 31 . 12/28/2008
Yay! I'm back again. Well, this chapter was definitely exciting, especially at the end, to say the least. Though, it was a bit short. I just hope that Lynn and her generation will have changed their minds after this battle. By the way, what's an Orak?

VelvetyCheerio chapter 30 . 12/28/2008
Wow, Azuren made quick work of those two. I wonder what their leader will say.

As for the wolf, awesome! It was so cool, he should use his spirit animal more. (speaking of wolves, I noticed you changed your avatar. It's adorable!)

Well, I'll be back at a later time to review the next five chapters, but for now, I must be off.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 29 . 12/28/2008
I was wondering what had become of Anglas after Ranor died. That really has to suck. And all the children getting captured? Ranor's son must be some sick bastard!

As for diction in this story, it's appropriate, considering the setting and time period, but I think the use of the word "retard" doesn't fit the tone. It just seems to modern for me.

Well, it was a good chapter otherwise. I can't wait to see what happens when Azuren faces Ranor's son.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 28 . 12/28/2008
Well, it seems the plot has taken a sharp turn. These, Shards of Fate, though I was glad Azuren found all three so quickly, I am also a little disappointed. I was sort of hoping that he would have to go on a long journey to find the third one, but hey, it was still good.

And that seer in his dream was rather strange. I'm amazed that a Creator would actually contact Azuren. He must be really important. Eldan as well, considering that he actually has to bring two enemy sides together. How unfortuante. Hopefully, he'll be able to complete his task.

Good chapter, I liked it. Velvet.
VelvetyCheerio chapter 27 . 12/28/2008
Interesting, though Eldan losing his sister was sad. T.T Well, at least he taught Renkai a thing or two. Hmm, something about that duel is getting mighty suspicious. I hope it brings up something in the plot soon. Good work.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 26 . 12/28/2008
Hi! Yeah, I've been doing my best to review stories on my alert list, or ones I really need to get around to reviewing, so I've been really scatter brained.

Anyway, this was a good chapter. Renkai appears to be a character that might be important later, though it's hard to tell. As for what Eldan has to say about his past, I can only find out if I continue on.

Alteng chapter 13 . 12/27/2008
Okay, I actually read this one before the other one. I printed up the wrong chapter. That's lucky 13 for you.

Somehow, I was reminded of one of the Shonen Jump Mangas (i.e. Dragonball Z, Naruto, Bleach, and the like), where your master fighter faces down expert thugs, but he is able to keep from killing innocent bystanders. At least, Ranor got what was coming to him.

A little grammarical bit for you. When a character pauses or stutters in speech as Ranor is doing, use the '. . .' for it. Actually, it does some visual things for it as well, because it draws out the line.

Ranor's line about the economy was a good one, but I do think that Azuren is that stupid or forgiving to buy it. Ranor has taunted him too much.

I would think that Azuren would want Ilgen's body as well. What do people do with such bodies? Burn them, maybe?

Anyway, nice chapter. I will probably not review tomorrow, because I intend to concentrate on the new chapter for Bane.
Alteng chapter 12 . 12/27/2008
I;ve had a heck of a time getting this printed up to read. It doesn't help when you run out of paper on Christmas eve!

Anyway, Haldel has a point on this. I was thinking that the suggestion that killing Ranor will not right the past, but it is most definately a hump that needs to be overcome. It will also protect the forest and the elves since the man did tell Azuren that he intended to raid the forest in search of the treasure.

The one complaint I do have with the chapter is that I can't imagine Ranor would know that he would come alone. I would think that he would figure him to enlist all the help he could muster. It would be what he would do. That could lead to some nasty taunts in Azuren's appearance alone as well.
VelvetyCheerio chapter 25 . 12/23/2008
Aah, when you mentioned Eldan was 98, I was like, what the crud! But then I remembered he's an elf. Duh! :P

As for the battle, positively exciting. I wasn't expecting the outcome though. For a second, I really thought Eldan had won, but in the end, he had lost. I don't quite understand, though.

Eldan only showed signs of a cold sweat and not really physical damage. That confused me. *~*

Good chapter though. I'll save the rest for another time.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 24 . 12/23/2008
Yeah! Azuren scored the first point, but I have a feeling Eldan's not going to let him get much past that. It was short, but very exciting. Nice work.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 23 . 12/23/2008
What? Oh no, that can't be good at all. Good friends fighting each other. Well, it promises to be interesting. Hmm, I rather like Bryorn. He's kind of funny. XD

I enjoy how everyone just sort of bonded with one another instantly. So many characters blending together was nice. Good work. I'm excited about the battle ahead.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 22 . 12/23/2008
Well, the authors note was very enlightening. The dualists look like they might be the most influential characters as the story continues, so I can wait to find out more about that.

As for Azuren going through his rite of passage, I don't know why, but I found it hilarious to know that he has to "cut himself" to summoun his wolf spirit. Funny stuff.

Well, I can't wait to see how he does at the Festival of Alliances. Sounds like fun. Good job.

VelvetyCheerio chapter 21 . 12/23/2008
Nice chapter, Djinn is so unpredictable. He makes me smile though. Mm, there isn't much to say on this chapter, what with all the dialogue, but I like Thelanor's character. I think you made Fenris in elf form a bit too similar to Djinn though.

Good job otherwise. It was a nice chapter.

Alteng chapter 11 . 12/23/2008
Well, this explains what has gone on while Azuren has been gone. You know, you would think that the people of the village might suspect foul play somewhere, because of the sudden deaths that are popping up. But, the village head and Lakus and wife are so unrelated that it would be hard to connect.

You didn't need to tell us about Ranor's poison again. You can let us have that mental cookie for remembering that one, and besides, Azuren is peeved enough at him to go after him.

And I just knew that Ilgen had to be dead by now.

Still, this story seems to be moving along in an unique sort of way. As for it being emo, I don't think so. The angst seems well founded. He isn't going around whining and cutting himself up about having noone, then his friends keep trying to help him. He does not have anyone until he gets Fenris and he's so different, and the elven friendship is just now starting.
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