Reviews for mermaid blues
Ephemeral Seraphim chapter 1 . 4/8/2005
I didn't review this either? *gasp* This, this is so brilliant! I like the references that you make here, especially about the Finding Nemo-esque corals, and everything here is beautifully worded, and the analogies, as always, are wonderfully fitted into the poem and the formatting and poetic devices throughout this piece are always well placed. Great stuff.

chibichocobo
the cereal killer chapter 1 . 1/15/2005
I know you put this in your CAP portfolio.
arcanum-zw chapter 1 . 1/8/2005
Haha when I saw "echolocating" I thought "e-chocolate" and I thought it was a spelling error. Blur little me haha.

Nothing wrong with angst on Christmas what. I did a negative poem on Christams too. The ideas and imagery of the mermaid isn't brand-new, but it's fortified by the excellent vocabulary that is too cheem for me to understand XP.
reicheru chapter 1 . 1/8/2005
i thought it was more like.. two mermaids actually. cos i dont remember a scene in the little mermaid where she sits on a rock. or maybe i just have bad memory.

why not christmas. its a very nice poem. yay i like mermaids to! *beamms* hahass. its so sad though :( i like happy mermaids better. but then again i like happy-anythings better.

lovee,rei.
dollface and her cancer chapter 1 . 1/4/2005
Yet another extravagant poem. Even if it's angst on Christmas, it is WORTHWHILE angst on Christmas. So therefore it is certainly worth reading. I like the blend of modern flow and more classic language. Really nice job.
poetic abortion chapter 1 . 1/3/2005
*O* My God this was brillant.

Noelle
cheeseworth chapter 1 . 12/31/2004
oh haha the reason why i've abstained from reviewing for so long is because your piece keeps making me feel extremely bad about my similarly-themed and highly pretentious one. at the risk of sounding sycophantic, i would say it is lightyears ahead of mine in terms of, well, everything. but, uh, i decided to be a tad more mature today.

i think one of your strengths lie in line breaks, because you handle them with much ease and for maximum effect. and this poem flows very well; it sounds goodly (i can think of no other word, sorry) natural. i love the way you humanise (again this is an imaginary word, die braincells die) it with the 'you know's and questions, because it makes it more personal and accessible as well. or at least that's how it rubs off on me. you make poetry look easy, because your tone is just so crinkle-free, but everything means anything and that rocks. your angst is lovely and not in the least hormone-induced, which i love. i dig, dawg!
Aimee Raven chapter 1 . 12/28/2004
Lol! I'm sorry...but inspiration coming from tales or...Disney cartoons seems to have struck us both at the same time. I really like this, and it's hardly angst to me...some great imagery and a lovely way to tell a story! I loved it! Love, Mia
tablesalt chapter 1 . 12/27/2004
Love the second stanza the most. I intepreted it as one whole mermaid, though. Okay. 'one whole mermaid' sounds weird. Sounds like someone went to cut her up. Yeah. Great job, as usual. What more can I say? :)
natthatter chapter 1 . 12/27/2004
, i'd prefer one. then there'd be more development and flow. but good either way.

very nice rhythm. i like. and to tellk the truth i don't like the last stanza. don't ask why., i do feel strange today too. and if you read it more, the ending does sound quite rushed.

out of an orange-colored sky sea. well, orange-tinted anyways.
Manuel Fajar chapter 1 . 12/25/2004
There is an interesting word, marinist; one of its meanings is someone that is interested in the relationship between ocean and land; and the other is related to the bombastic Italian poet Mari. I suppose I take on a bit of both when I say that I love this poem in so many ways; and, that it speaks to me in such a familiar, yet unheard of tongue—as only the full moon high up in the sky, shining strangely on a field of snow, on Christmas, in sandy marshes where it snows once every hundred years.
hahahahahaha chapter 1 . 12/25/2004
Oh a Merry Christmas to you, Melly. I won't deny that this is well-written, with the same old compliments, from good metaphorical phrases to vivid descriptions and impactful phrases. However, I found it a bit too long, if you asked me. And, ANGST ON CHRISTMAS? *tsk tsk*
Made in U.S.A chapter 1 . 12/25/2004
this is so well written and i really enjoyed reading it. please keep writing and thanks so much for the review. merry christmas :D
kerbieflaw chapter 1 . 12/25/2004
you do it so well, you make me feel like drawing everything out. literally. unfortunately my drawings might not do your poem justice. so let's forget that. i like how you can interpret as five mermaids or one. (i take one.) the ending's very beautiful. i don't know how to say it, but... it's just so sad and yet, beautiful at the same time. (gosh. i feel cliche.)merry christmas, melly.
moonarised polane chapter 1 . 12/25/2004
hmn. im taking it as five different mermaids. cos it seems to make it better that way.

hmn. you're writing a bunch of sad sad stuff on x'mas? man. you nuthead.

my favourite was the first mermaid. i dont know. the mafia gang thing was funny. haha. cute. and the black oyster hearts was interesting. i really loved the first mermaid.

hmn. the second is a little mermaid? as in young little mermaid. the finding nemo touch was intriguing and the stanza was a little thought-provoking. you're like my cousin. he's anti-shark's fin. uhhuh.

the third sounded like something we've seen before. you know, there are women out there who wait for the perfect man to coem along and there are all these others who have fallen head over heels for them but the females don't love them? and the guys go jump off buildings or something. the hair part was interesting. i dont know why. i guess it was the choice of words. jumped out at me and stuck in my head. the gun and drowning part was a nice touch.

i didn't really like the fourth one. don't ask why. so we skip it.

the fifth was scary. about her not forgetting. eeks. and the conch shells and the cerulean taffeta being likened to the sea.. could imagine them.

the last two line were fantastic. i liked them.

so another wonderful piece from kismet. not unexpected. and hey, have more self-confidence.