|Reviews for unspoken screaming|
| Ephemeral Seraphim chapter 1 . 4/8/2005
Ah man, I was sure that I reviewed this one too. But that doesn't matter, since I always enjoy reading your works. Let's see, you also have effective formatting and poetical devices throughout the piece, especially with the parenteses and stream of consciousness flow going around here. It's well done, and makes the overall product all the more effective. Your massive vocabulary is also brilliant in this piece, and you make poetry as this seem so effortless and easy. The last line was beautiful conclusion to this masterwork, and I hope to see more like this in the future.
| KonekOniko chapter 1 . 2/6/2005
| acccountkiller chapter 1 . 1/29/2005
Aww...that's such a sad poem...poor girl...*sigh*. Nothing to say, awesome as usual. Love, Mia
| clockwork kiss chapter 1 . 1/18/2005
Very, very nice work. I love all the allusions stuffed in here :). The first and the second stanzas in the parenthesis were my favorites. "she got lost in swirling / origami paper" especially brought a pretty picture to my mind. The last parenthesis stanza brought your poem's true meaning to life, and the pace seemed to speed up, hitting home at the last line with a bang. Only critique: The 4th parenthesis stanza didn't seem to fit in as well as the other four. The imagery just seemed... different. Not bad, but not the same, either. Anyways... GREAT work. I enjoyed muchly.
| SeraphicTempest chapter 1 . 1/18/2005
Rather bitter and cynical with a sardonic tone. Brilliant poem, fits right in with your style. Will you be updating HOA soon?
| really chapter 1 . 1/16/2005
ooh girl power i sense. haha. this is really powerful too. you've got a sense of rhythm and the style is unique. but yeah, what's with the brackets? it seems a bit.. wannabe NO OFFENCE. REALLY. i think it helps with the atmosphere and mood though, as if the speaker is whispering, thinking.
| reicheru chapter 1 . 1/15/2005
uhh. i liked the strawberries part. happy belated birthday evelyn in case you're seeing this.
hamlet brings back bad memories.
| Ohmm chapter 1 . 1/14/2005
Aha beautiful imagery and description as always. The only gripe I have is that sometimes I don't really get the flow - or perhaps that's because I don't know evelyn personally ._. Good job though!
| only weekdays chapter 1 . 1/13/2005
i absolutely love the strawberries and the mermaid part because they are something that is SO there and something that would never cross my mind to write.
| Manuel Fajar chapter 1 . 1/13/2005
Nametag on lapel,
Rigoletto puns her name,—
Fat lady stung sung.
Morons—fox: both your black locks,
Perplexed, not vexed hex,—
Cannot contain you. —m—
| myno chapter 1 . 1/13/2005
i love it. All the statements, and then images, anecdotes, slices of life in brackets. beautiful.
| hahahahahaha chapter 1 . 1/13/2005
O.o what's this with the brackets? uhh I did like the choice of words in this poem. Prefer to your previous one. but what you've been writing lately doesn't seem to captivate me much. maybe because it's too long... hmm -winter