Reviews for A Virgin State of Mind
Alex chapter 1 . 2/19/2005
i think this is a pretty good could maybe use some punctuation, but that's not really a big thing. It is really well written and the description and vocabulary is awesome. the line "the absence of her pulse perfect the Notion of traquility" is a great line. On thing that could be imporved is the flow...some of the lines don't flow perfectly...
Cassie chapter 1 . 2/13/2005
omg WOW! Ari that was so good! your a really good writer. im jealous of your skill~
david chapter 1 . 2/12/2005
very nice
stine chapter 1 . 1/31/2005
haha oh ari...dude, that was really good! the last night was an especially nice touch :)
DivaE chapter 1 . 1/25/2005
Absolutely exquisite. Great descriptions, adjectives, etc. Very, VERY good. :D
Mandie chapter 1 . 1/25/2005
Hey - this was beautiful! I can tell you spent a long time perfecting the vocabulary that you used. My favorite lines are "as queer as black sunshine - wicked" That sent shivers up my spine. Write more!:)
Hit chapter 1 . 1/25/2005
heythis is a really great poem. I really love all of the description and just the style and the way you wrote ! :)
Element99 chapter 1 . 1/24/2005
OMG! What a good poem! Your so good at writing...this is going on my fav list momentarily...