|Reviews for Forbidden Love|
| Shana2004 chapter 2 . 7/28/2009
Wow interesting, I just want to read more!
| Shana2004 chapter 1 . 7/25/2009
I read the old one it is so cool! Now I know where I can read your rewites! U rite pretty sweet.
| ValerieYoung chapter 27 . 4/29/2009
awesome story. wat song did u use in da last chapter?
| rosieroo chapter 5 . 7/20/2008
this is an awesome story! but i just wanted to say, that i think she should react more to her aunt dying... the chapter before was good in that, but in this one its like she's forgotten about her!
but seriously, this is a great story
| LittleEmoKid chapter 18 . 5/25/2008
I know it's a bit late to post this review since you've finsished and all, but some say vampire blood tastes quite good. On a more personal note I think it would be a good idea for you to describe the human's blood. Like maybe Alana's blood tasted like Honey and Milk with a hint of cinnamon or something you know. Humans can also taste Vampire blood. Each vampire and human can have a distinct taste to their blood. Anywho, just a thought love.
| ChristianAngel01 chapter 27 . 4/24/2008
Wow! I loved it
Vampire and vampire slayer it was really funny
I loved the way it turned it out
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
| Zhenny chapter 27 . 1/20/2008
I agree with you that the story does need a LOT of editing. But I'm still impressed with your grammar and writing, although sometimes your sentences should have ended or had a comma, but kept going instead. Sort of a run-on sentence? Well, don't take this as a bad review, I don't mean for it to be. ):
Hm... you already know of the numerous plot holes, so I won't mention those. And I'm not complaining. Those things are bitches.
All I really have to say is that the story didn't have much thought. Like, it was too much action and the plot moving on with Logan and Alana's romance. Alan wasn't phased so much by her Aunt dying in that horrifying way - and I understand she's had training to deal with that - but she sort of got over it fast.
So my only real, true suggestion that I don't think you've mentioned yet is that you should add on more to the story instead of rushing it. Especially since it's a first-person POV.
I also must pick at the characters... I have to say, they could use some work. The story was somewhat cliche, but it really was just the characters that made it that. They just seemed generic.
God, I'm sorry for picking at your story. D; I really did enjoy it, I did, I'm just trying to help, and you don't have to take my suggestions, and I might be very wrong (as I think I might be because of your many reviewers that I lack).
Any way, you inspired me to write a vampire story of my own, so I think I'll try my hand at it soon. Thank you for the good-read, and I'll read your sequel once (or if it already is) out. So, good job! I congratulate you, especially since you went in and admitted that the story did need some work and you were planning on fixing it all up. ;D Mad love, Authoress.
| MK16 chapter 27 . 9/30/2007
I LOVED IT!
Has to be one of the best vampire stories i have read! XD
Lol! but the plot was awsome
and the ending RULED!
haha great job! and hurry up and edit it so the sequel will come! JUST EDIT IT! but NO pressure whatso ever -cheesy grin- just take your time! -DO IT- make everything JUST right -DO IT- edit every chappie till your heart cant take it no more -HURRY UP AND DO IT- fix every little detail that has been nagging you -OR ELSE!-
haha i'll stop now! but great job! loved it to pieces XD
| Diamandis chapter 1 . 8/1/2007
That was really good, i love vampire romance , there the best type of storie and i love the whole forbidden love thing.
| Black and White Dreams chapter 11 . 7/19/2007
haha! i was right! it was the King ]
i would love for logan to stop being an ass and alana to stop being a bitch
and for them to just get along for five minutes
without sarcasm or death threats or steaks or any of that stuff.
it would make me a happy person.
| Black and White Dreams chapter 10 . 7/19/2007
Logan... is starting to scare me a tiny bit... and i'm gonna take a wild guess, but i think that the guy in alana's bed is the King himself? well, i'll read the next chapter and find out!
| Black and White Dreams chapter 9 . 7/19/2007
hehehe i'm loving this! i do wish Logan had told her what he did to Paul... i'm curious about that...
| Black and White Dreams chapter 8 . 7/19/2007
thats sorta harsh... she admits to having feelings for him and he just vanishes like that? your writing is so hot . lol i had to say it, i mean... good job describing the kiss lol
| Black and White Dreams chapter 7 . 7/19/2007
I love Logan, I really do ] I dunno why... i mean, he is extremely confusing, and he pisses me off, but there's just something about him that I really like. Anyway, I'm late on reading this, what was the title before? I'm just curious.
| Black and White Dreams chapter 6 . 7/19/2007
well that was totally unexpected... a ring? you never even mentioned it before, unless i missed something... that sort of felt like a spur of the moment idea to me. it was just so sudden. but i'm curious about it, so, on to the next chapter!