Reviews for United Segregation
Trinket chapter 4 . 5/5/2005
Oh I like it, you keep it very life-like and the characters are believable and, at least in Aaron's case, likeable. The storytelling is smooth and you can actually use a spellchecker! (jk..I'm a bit sick of those kids and their (mis)spelling)

Looking forward to more! -Trinket
Coconutofdoom chapter 4 . 5/5/2005
This story is good so far. Your a talented writter. However in some parts of the story it is a little confusing(it may be me..I'm sick _)its mostly the dreams that are a little confusing. But once again it my be me...update soonMichelle
princessmax chapter 4 . 5/3/2005
That's one damn good cop.

You're doing an excellent job with this story; I didn't think you'd be able to write anything considerably better than Inevitably, because quite frankly, there are parts to Inevitably that I still remember because they were so 'true to life'. The bonfire in particular, with the toilet paper ripped off from the public loo; that really sticks in my mind.

I actually much prefer this, though. It's awkward and yuck to read through because it's so easy to see what Aaron's thinking and feeling, which makes it terrible but kind of addictive. I had to go back and re-read this several times because of the 'ugh-I-don't-want-to-think-too-hard-about-tis' factor.
Liebe Sasa chapter 4 . 5/3/2005
Oh man, poor Aaron. I feel like giving him a big hug, but that would probably hurt/freak him out even more. :(

~Sasa
Esquirella chapter 3 . 4/28/2005
Ah, there it is! And I'm working on beat-ing chapter 4 today.
ddz008 chapter 3 . 4/27/2005
Great chapter!I'm glad you have updated! :DHe wasn't dreaming? Was he raped?The rapist is the guy from the loo? Ah, now I have to read the next chapter! What happened?Keep writing, please!Great story!:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
princess max chapter 3 . 4/27/2005
WTF? Are you kidding me, is that last part in real life?

Jeez.
A Boy Flower chapter 2 . 4/11/2005
'Coop' makes me think of a chicken coop. At least, I think that's what it's called.I laughed at the bathroom scene. Maybe because I'm an idiot. I found it humorous, though. O.o some of the people you meet...I like Mr. No-Name, though.::adds to favorites::Ok, well, update soon!
A Boy Flower chapter 1 . 4/11/2005
I've read this about 12 times, and I always forget to review. I should learn telepathy. ::ish cool::...Man... I want three weeks off. Lucky bum.I like Bec! ::hugs Bec::
Lucifer's Sonata chapter 2 . 4/10/2005
that was so much fun to read! hahah please update soon! i really loved Aaron in this chapter...poor baby can't sleep though T_T can someone help the brother out? hahah update soon! good job!
princess max chapter 2 . 4/8/2005
'...or worse'

Worse. Far worse. *shudders*

Nice fourex ref, beer ads are pitifully funny/pathetic.

And there's a plot. And I write crap reviews.

Try and update a little quicker nextime, eh?
Esquirella chapter 2 . 4/8/2005
You make me wait for them. LOL! Good thing I get to read them before you post them.
Esquirella chapter 1 . 3/24/2005
Ah, it's up! Very cool! I think this chapter is a great start!
eighteen hundred chapter 1 . 3/23/2005
Ahh, I really like this. Aaron reminds me somewhat of myself. I really like your writing, its very...finished, if you know what I mean. Updat this soon
princess max chapter 1 . 3/22/2005
lol, neighbour's pissed at your cat's screeching? *doesn't blame them in the slightest*

Good start, I laughed at the scratching the bum part. Actually, all his workmates amused me to no end.

Poor Bec (yes, I sympathise with the women), feeling snubbed without a snub-ee in arms must be hard.

Anyway, update soon, I want to see if Aaron meets anyone whilst on holidays.
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