Reviews for if when
pneumothorax chapter 1 . 4/25/2005
Loved:'when the world lies in your shredderand the telephone line is deadi hope you remember that my shoulder is your hankyand i am your beefsteak.'

I like it.
zoogath chapter 1 . 4/16/2005
hee. the last part is funny. octopus!melly is morbid XD i'm thinking of morbidly blended people now. ,lovee zoogath.
Ephemeral Seraphim chapter 1 . 4/8/2005
Haha. This is especially clever and colorful, and the best part about your poetry is the imagery that you evoke through your words. I mean, I adore every line in this poem. You've earned a well-deserved place in my favorites, because all of your works are simply BRILLIANT. Nothing in my eloquence can describe how I truly feel about this piece.

KonekOniko chapter 1 . 4/1/2005
haha, very cool, very creative, and amazing! -
Chi Ame chapter 1 . 4/1/2005
OCTOPUS! That was good! Freaking awesome, very creative, I loves it!
Ohmm chapter 1 . 3/30/2005
Darling, the teachers must have been BLIND. I loved the contemplation involved in the fourth stanza most.
Nobody-n-Particular chapter 1 . 3/29/2005
I don't know if I am supposed to laugh, but this was highly entertaining in an ominous way. Quite nice.
kismet chapter 1 . 3/29/2005
oh great. i didn't make it. icykayle did. frisson rae did. dang, i think everyone did but me. someone hand me a marijuana leaf, i WILL go shrivel up and die. i hope i have enough good karma to be reincarnated as a fairy queen or something. -kismet.
amphiboly chapter 1 . 3/29/2005
good effort. though your rest were better. dont freak over CAP. you have talent and you will get in. ((:
tablesalt chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
Loved the 3rd stanza the most. The part about struggling and making the hole "bigger, bigger, bigger" was a little strange, but perhaps it's just me. Not your best, but it ain't bad either. Keep on writing. And don't stress over CAP. If you don't make it, I'd eat paint. (not that I've not eaten enough to last a lifetime). Aye.
negligible fictional force chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
all right, so tell me which are the hard words, and i'll oblige in the explanation. -kismet.
magicbubble chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
haha dont be stressed about CAP can? haha so many people are... but youre this poem is NICE coz i understand it without thinking to much. its effortless!
hahahahahaha chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
haha i understand the anxiety... yeah well i've been through it already... and still going through it. . it amazes me to wonder if acsi will still keep up its standards of 1 person per year in sec 2 gep or not. (:anyway, about your poem, it started off a bit cliched, but it proceeded well i guess. i didn't like the repetition - a bit overrated. but the imagery was kinda nice, although i thought it wasn't powerful enough. haha, not as good as some of your previous poems. cheers.
acccountkiller chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
LMAO! I LOVE this! It's brilliant! And so hilarious I might all the metaphores rock! Love,mia
this is britt chapter 1 . 3/28/2005
"and i am your beefsteak." quite the wonderful trip I took while reading this.