Nice, the pace is good, and from the way Hakuno writes his letter you can really get a feel for his personality. (Although I don't think the first note on pronunciations was neccessary... I would rather have just gone straight on to the story. Anyway, I suppose some other people would find it helpful.)

I would try and pick up on something to critique, but you haven't really got a lot here. I'll keep an eyes out for updates, as I'll probably be able to analyse chapter one with greater depth.

I do hope you're going to continue this...D