Kudos. Perhaps your best work. Original title. You write as though you are a college grad correct? Seems. I will be waiting for more work on all of your things...

It is suprising and refreshing that a boy of your age (i'm assuming you are in college) could write such a 'girl-power' sort of script, yet I have to say, it is very well-plotted, and although the grammar, at times, it poor, I expect nothing less, as few people take fiction press so seriously as too make several drafts of one scene. However,I find the story with good continous humor and suspence.

Continue writing

Woah! Great, great next chapter! I was a little confused, though, when it was all messhed together. Fictionpress, apparently, didn't do that spacing thingy, and it was a little hard 2 follow. to get more reviews you might want 2 edit that out... but great! Aretheina-(how'd you say it? AR-E-th-NEE-AA is how i'm sayin' it, but not sure) -seems to be developing so much. And thank you so much for saying my name on you're area of typing! And i'm so sorry i reviewed on My Life's story, and not the Second Time TO Die review area, i was just really anxious at that time and sort of...did somthing stupid! Lol. I'm not really a good writer, and i actually haven't really written anything. I just like to read young writers who are sort of experiencing suggestions and fiddling with plots! You're is a fresh, memorable idea and i shall review you're next chapter! My friends that i told ya about, Becca and Sara, have accounts of their own now. Sarah actually reviewed you're story! I think her account just reviewed you! Anyways, i think that you're a pretty great writer, and that's so cool!

It's a good idea, and you're a pretty smooth writer. Are you in college? -it's true that you might want to put more semicolons where there are coma's, since it's regular that younger freshman type usually aren't very fond of semicolon's. i know ';' might not seem very appealing, but it works pretty well. Ah, that was just suggestion! My only critisism is that the first chapter is too short! Keeps the suspence going, though. I like it. As for more praise, it seems that Aretheina is a pretty powerful, yet hilarious charactor. It seems like a light story, although at the same time it has a twist. Really hope you end this one pretty good...

Cool

Hey update already

THE CHAPTERS ARE TWO SHORT!here i am, toodling along,then i see your i click on this i read, and i'm like,I LUV IT MORE MORE NOW!and then you update it, (and thanks for updating so son! LOL! (lol, lots of luv)) and you update it to this short wittle chapter! ga!

i like the idea but I think the first chapter is too short

It rocks. it's a good start. right more! it's rare that you actually get reviews within 3 days. people must really like your stories.i agree with the other 2 people who posted: grammer needs a little work. fantabulous, though. and guys don't say that...heh.I'm glad your writing fantasy

Nice start, though I'd suggest to watch some of your grammar. There are a couple run-one sentences where you should've probably used semicolon instead of a comma. Or made it two separate sentences. But other than that, I thought it was a nice start and I like the unique name you used for the protagonist.

Me likes. except for the title, cause it just says: Aretheina time to die, not Arething: time to die. it seems , i like it!