|Reviews for NIGHT air|
| saccharine lust aerial chapter 1 . 1/20/2006
oh! i love that first line: " my fingers ring with cold air" this is such good imagery. that one line hooked me in. it describes innocence tainted, freedom, secret prisons, etc. this is a great poem. please keep writing.
| Next Exit chapter 1 . 6/19/2005
Stunning. It's how my brother died, but I didn't think of that first.
| AboveTheSalt chapter 1 . 6/17/2005
Again, another awe-striking poem! "and the lines waver, frantic and sick" is, without a doubt, my favorite line. It gives the sincere feeling of panic and utter despair. Love the imagery and the sudden ending (good night seems to be a popular resolution, as I've used it myself once). Left me on the edge of my seat, slamming like the car to a dead end close. I can see my mental mindcar crushing between two opposing forces. Brilliant.
| Sarah-Brighteyes chapter 1 . 6/10/2005
Well that was not quite what I was expecting, but none the less you got my full attention. the poem started off enchating as though any ride might be at night, yet it had a warning amidst it, "As stars dying to their death." Very interesting, nicely written. Bravo to you.
| poetic abortion chapter 1 . 6/10/2005
beautiful, tragic but still gorgeous and well written, the way you display it is your own and is intensified by your own words. wonderful. wonderful work! this has a place on my favorites, its just so deeply tragic without going over board. love it.
!~* noelle *~!
| Hilary chapter 1 . 6/6/2005
Wow.I love it, and sorry I've forgotten all my GCSE English words/analytic thingers.
I enjoy the following most;
'driving the motorway at night' (love how it's worded, almost as though you're in control of the motorway)'has no idea of what tonight means,' (just makes me think :))'the moment comes a single hit,' (again love the phrasing).
| Moonlight Tigress chapter 1 . 6/6/2005
wow... very deep...and so full of meaning! you're brilliant! :)and thanks for reviewing me! I've just posted another chapter of Finally Found, too! GOODNIGHT!AND NEVER STOP WRITING! YOU HAVE SO MUCH TALENT!
| and flowers chapter 1 . 6/6/2005
it reminds me of the slightest thing i cannot remember, god damn. amazing yet the same. i like "goodnight." it seems to seal it well.
| cynicaldays chapter 1 . 6/5/2005
I like this it conveys pain and innocence...just realized you actually use innocent to describe the girl and now my review is a loser...it asks me what death really is, is it really a good night or is it something more than that? where does all of the pain go?
| Eddy chapter 1 . 6/5/2005
Good job! This is a really neat and abstract poem. I guess at first glance most people would assume that this poem was about the author wanting to spend a nice evening with the passenger girl. The way I see it, he took her out that night and purposely crashed the car. I sort of got this idea from the part "the girl in the passengerhas no idea of what tonight means." In the end, it doesn't seem like there's any regret or sense of remorse. Thus, the author pretty much had this whole scheme planned from the beginning. Crazy fool. Chicken noodle. :P
| Cry Tears of Darkness chapter 1 . 6/5/2005
ouch, does happen doesnt it? too bad tho. nice poem
| BlueRose218 chapter 1 . 6/5/2005
...I was not expecting that at all... I'm impressed.
| Cloud Burst chapter 1 . 6/5/2005
wow, powerful and jarring at the end. awesome work!
| floppybelly chapter 1 . 5/31/2005
Hey, you reviewed my fic, so I'm reviewing yours!
In response to your query about my origins, no I am not from England. I simply wish I was. British people make me happy. :D I wonder why you stopped at the chapter you did, however, as I consider chapter 5 to be the most humorous. (Excuse me, that would be humourous, wouldn't it?) I do love it when people point out things that are good, of which you did a great deal. However, I do also like to know how I can improve something.
Anyways, this is supposed to be a review of your poem, so here goes. As far as I can tell, this is a scenario of a car accident, perhaps caused by a malfunction in the car itself. I was a bit confused about the line, "Her hair the wind" but I suppose you have artistic lisense that way. I wonder if there are more than one person in the car, and why it is sometimes third person, and sometimes first. It's also very nice to compare going to sleep with dying. And the line about the girl not knowing what tonight means is kind of creepy, because it's quite strong forshadowing. I wonder, if this is first person, if the speaker knows ahead of time what will happen? Creepy. And the title- why is the NIGHT all in caps? I assume there is a , good poem, good reviews, and so on and so forth. I'd like to perhaps have your email address so that I don't have to pollute your stories with my responses to your reviews. My email is so feel free to drop me a line! to hear from you soon. Cheers.
| somefreakylooknchick chapter 1 . 5/30/2005