Wow. A lot of inconsistancies and oopsies, but a very compelling story. For all its faults it more then makes up in inginuity and character development.

Pleace continue, I want to see where this is going.

I must say, this is a rather different outtake on the typical science fiction story. If you were to condense this into a short story, I think you would have a definite chance of getting it published in a magazine like Analog or Asimov's, as it appears to be something those magazines would accept.

This stuff is very addictive! I love the way you keep feeding the reader one small thing after another, really kept me interested. Please write on! :D

This was an intriguing story. Intriguing, and very entertaining. And it probably had the best summary I've ever seen.

I couldn't recognize all of the characters, and the paragraphs were really short sometimes. The chars were interesting, though, especially the ones who were most well-developed. The main character seemed poorly developed, but it didn't seem like he needed much development.

The world you described was very entertaining and coherent. I wondered why the main char didn't ask more questions of the first people he saw, but it was only a minor inconvenience. I loved seeing how everyone got along with each other, and did things spontaneously like their percussion session. I kept reading because I wanted to find out what this job they were applying for was, and I became comfortable with the characters you had written and got to enjoy hearing about them.

Not a literary masterpiece, but with enough psychological depth to propel it forward, and keep the reader glued to his seat.

But you didn't finish the story. You stopped it right before the end. And for that, I must kill you. .

*Raises eyebrow in Mr. Spock fashion* Is there an update sometime within the immediate future, I hope?

Great story so far, girl. You wouldn't happen to be majoring in ancient world history yourself now, would you? (I'm quite interested in that myself...)

An excellent first five chapters with only minor spelling and grammar errors. The only flaw I feel needs correcting is your introduction of so many characters in such a short span of time. If a character is not going to help the story progress dynammically or be of critical importance to any main character, then try not to name them. They are only nuisances that later must be cleared up and serve mostlyu to confuse a readers' brain with information overload.

All that being said, so far you have developed your plot tremendously and drawn the reader in successfully. Keep it up.

Militarynut32489

Wierd. Can't wait to find out what is going on. Update soon, happy writing!

ok now you got my head spinning. swords, disembodiment, possible death. you have to keep going and fast. i need to know what the hell is going on.

This is very well written, if not slightly recountive. I can't wait to find out what the job is!

Looks like an awesome story.

I love how you manage to introduce most of the cadets through Landon being well . . .Landon. I suppose.

I like all these new characters. I especially like landon. He's full of all sort of information!

Good chapter! I really like how you go into so much detail. Your story is really interesting and has peaked my curiosity.

Story is still good. Keep going. I really want to know what this secret gov't job is all about.

Hey, not a bad start. The only thing i noticed was missing was that he didn't talk to any of the other 'special trainees'. Update soon, you've aroused my curiosity.