Reviews for When Time Sleeps
I'll Be Your Fairytale chapter 20 . 7/12/2006
Glad to see a new chapter and I like the POV of Philip rather than always the same person. Excellent as always. I can barely wait for the next bit!
Eyetk chapter 19 . 7/9/2006
Woot! You're alive! And being alive is, y'know, a good thing. I can sympathise with getting side-tracked, though.

Okay, so, yes, a much shorter chapter than your usuals. You should probably go back and flesh it out, maybe, if only for consistancy (not that I can talk, there), or maybe just tack it on to the start of the next chapter. S'up to you, 'course.

'That night, I watched as Goneril’s homeless gathered around the great bonfire that once was thousands’ sources of income.' The last part of that sentance is...huh, very awkward, really. I'd recommend rephrasing.

'...a Sorceress more powerful that Selena Valentiqua had risen!'-'that' ought to be 'than', neh?

Huh, okay, so Lucy's her usual wonderful self, heh. And the other two are...well, going to be interesting to see how those three get along! It struck me how Lucy's comments on how such riches are wasted on the princess were very much in her character, and consistant with her childhood-well done. It also occured to me, as I recalled the first part of the story, how much your writing has improved since you started this. Fun villifying of Adriel, too, although a bit more exposition on that might round it out. On the other hand, people usually don't go up and hand out hugs to the saviour of the realm, but rather hold them in a bit more awe...although I could see how someone might do that with Lucy, seeing how she is tiny, and a girl still, really.

It would be interesting to see a bit more expansion in the intervening years, however. After all, the spinning wheel crisis will affect her adopted mother greatly-it would be interesting to see some character development over the intervening years. A general overview of events, with some integrated scenes that show greater detail, would be very interesting to read about. There's so much potential for character development in there.

Okay, uh, I'm really very confused about which kingdom Phillip is from, and the kings, and the spinning wheels, after the second paragraph in the second section. I thought I had it figured out, but now I don't...clarification is needed, here, please.

Other than that-cheers! Heh, the 'And that was how they met' amused me greatly, for some reason.

Welcome back!
Raptora chapter 2 . 7/8/2006
Hmm-this looks like an interesting story. I'll review as I go.

"I wearily opened my book, not hiding a sigh as I stared blankly at [a] page."-Might just be me, but considering she was told to turn to a specific page, it might be better to use 'the' instead of 'a'.

“The King of Stadler at the time of the Temple Wars was known for his bad reputation as leader. As a matter of fact, “blundering idiot” could have been the best words to describe him. Of course, he might have been more intelligent that we gave him credit- it took careful planning to stage the Temple Wars for economic gain…”-Ha-liked that bit. Why do I get the feeling that's not what the book actually says?

Aha. Magic would explain it, yes. Interesting use of magic here.

"[But won’t it mess up my studies[,]” I confessed the real reason that I didn’t want to take the test.-That's a question there, so you could either put in a question mark, or change it to a statement. Whatever works.

"“Changed around the textbook to say that the Temple Wars were started for economic gain,” I said.“They were, you know,” Mother said, laughing."-Haha, another good line, and a good way to end the story. This is a great start, and it's a very intriguing story. Wonder what'll happen with Lucie? Anyways, keep up the good work, and I look forward to reading the rest!
Islandbreeze chapter 19 . 7/4/2006
Hi...glad beyond glad to see a new chapter :)! So, the infant Roselle is spoiled...surprise, surprise. But I thought it interesting to see that you've made Lucie like her somewhat, and how she said her charms were stronger than she would have works well with the fairy godmother concept.

Hm, abrupt time skip...and to the Prince. I wonder what's going on with Roselle and Lucie now, the curse time is coming close, but I suppose I shall have to wait. I'm glad we got a look into Lucie's emotions first.

Now, Princess Naomi, hm...she sounds, interesting. And aloof, and certainly someone who could interfere with the whole Roselle/Phillip thing. I like how it started out with him invovled in the politics, since usually when the prince and princess meet, he's out for a stroll or something. This was much better:). Looking forward to the next chapter, enjoyed this one! Good work
ice flyer chapter 19 . 7/3/2006
Glad to see you're back. Don't I know about having NO time for updates...I'm guilty too...

Anyways, it was not a bad chapter at all. I liked Philip's POV and how you really gave the spinning wheel crisis some reality in how it affected the economy and so forth. Who is Princess Naomi? If she was mentioned before, I completely forget about her. If not, well, she's an interesting character all right.

I do think you could expand on Roselle's childhood a little. Not necessarily in great detail - we don't need an account of every year - but something outlining how she was as a toddler, then a teen, etc?

Anyways...good chapter. I'd love to see where you're going with this twisted fairy tale!
Phoenix-ofthe-Goldenrose chapter 19 . 7/2/2006
You updated! YAY! It's been awhile, yes it has. However, it's still just as wonderful! Princess Naomi sounds very interesting, and I'm sure we'll get to hear more from her later. Very glad to finally know what's going on in Lucie's life again. Update soon!
ADSpencer chapter 19 . 7/2/2006
I don't care if it's short! Great work!
free-to-dream15 chapter 19 . 7/2/2006
oh wow, it's been awhile hasnt it! lol I had to read a few chapters back to remember everything again but I think I've got it! Short, but nice chapter! update SOON!
The Light of Earendil chapter 19 . 7/2/2006
Haha I love how the spinning wheel ban has affected the economy. Nice touch. I love when you throw in details like that to make the story more true and realistic. Great job, keep it up!
theysayshannon chapter 19 . 7/1/2006
Well, welcome back! I was actually just wondering a few days ago if you planned on returning. :) Don't feel bad, because I myself took a long hiatus from writing too. I'm going to have to go back and re-read most of my stuff so I remember where I am in my writing. (Although you still have a few chapters to go anyways. :P)

So for reviews;I actually liked it. Yes, it is a bit choppy, but I wouldn't add more to it. The length was good and it introduced new characters semi-smoothly. I love the mysteriousness of Princes Naomi, and "that was how they met." So what is it they are going to do now that they met?

Intruiging. :]
Celtic Dancer chapter 19 . 7/1/2006
YES AND DOUBLE YES WITH A HYPHEN! When I first encountered this story, the plot summary itself caught me and I ended up reading the entire thing as quickly as I possibly could. When I reached the last chapter (so far), I was disappointed, but I have waited patiently and now the long-awaited continuation is here!

Your writing style astounds me; you are amazing. I would steal some of your talent if I could. (but then of course I'd feel absolutely awful) I understand what you mean about skipping Roselle's early childhood. The daily routine of an infant does not exactly add to the plot.

Anyway, despite your slight dislike of the way you have written this, I loved it to pieces, just like the others, and I hope you can find time to continue soon!

Kiyume chapter 19 . 7/1/2006
I'm sure glad you updated! It's been so long I had to go back and read the last chapter to make sense of things. It's a good chapter, and worth the wait. I was half expecting Princess Naomi to be Lucy. Our princess' name is Roselle, right? I'm also a little confused about who lives and/or belongs to which nation... I'm too lazy to go reread all the chapters, though. (Not that it wouldn't be worth it!)

I hope you'll find time this summer to work on this fantastic summer; I know your fans will be waiting! Thanks again for the update!
ZealousKnight chapter 19 . 7/1/2006
I am SO GLAD you haven't abandoned this story! You've no idea how excited I was when I got the author alert. I was just thinking the other day that I wished you'd update.

All right, enough gushing. Yes, I suppose this chapter is a bit more concise than I'd like, but you know what? After waiting so long, I'll take it.

The point of view change is going to be interesting. I've been following Lucie for so long now and enjoy her voice. But I have faith in you. You've brought us this far, I trust you to carry us through to the end and make it worth the journy.

Glad you're back!
The Gobbler chapter 10 . 6/21/2006
Hmm, I'm beginning to wonder about Adriel. I kind of like her, but I'm just not sure... anyway, I liked Master Mentira's name, just because I recognized the word "mentira" from Spanish... but yeah, good job, again. I think I say that in every single review if I like the story.
softlycryingrain chapter 18 . 6/2/2006
Ok, I'm back. Once again, marvelous job! I love how you follow the story line but still make it your own. But I'm curious, is Roselle the original name from the Fairy tale? Or Aurora, I do know that is the one used in the Disney version. Anyway, I still like the name _

Hmm, well, Adriel cast the spinning wheel spell as expected, so now Lucie will be working against her best friend, it would seem. I'm sure you have some interesting dilemas planned out there. (which I look forward to, hopefully you're schedule will allow you to finish this soon!)

Oh, and I loved your descriptions of the naming ceremony, the room, the crowd, I could picture it all! The descriptions of the king and queen especially.

I'm just too thrilled with this story so far to offer any CC, my apologies!

But I was wondering (this is completely off the wall and you don't even need to answer it!) But how do Lucie's wings fit out through her dress? lolz, it seems like it would be difficult to fit them through holes cut in the back, since wings tend to be wider at the ends and thinner where they are connected...just a random thought I've always had when thinking of fairies!

Anyway, great job! I eagerly await more!
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