Reviews for The Last New Yorker |
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LunaChic chapter 1 . 9/14/2009 Hey, Stumbled onto this fic just now and I wanted to say that I really enjoyed what there is of it here. _ |
whisperingxblue chapter 5 . 12/15/2007 A year and a half of waiting for a little email to pop up in my inbox informing me of an update |
Jo chapter 1 . 5/30/2006 I'm hooked. I actually had to print out this chapter to read in the bath because i didnt want to stop reading.I really want to do some concept designs on your characters but your always so specific so there's no real work there lol. Cant wait for the next update |
JenniferBaby chapter 4 . 4/18/2006 PS: I agree with Heather in the... everythingness. You're wonderful and I love you. Her, our friend Jess, and myself spend our free time talking about this story and The Return. Be flattered and inspired! Please... Sorry about the double review, I got distracted and submitted before I was done. |
JenniferBaby chapter 5 . 4/18/2006 So, word is you don't update that often... Although I can respect that, considering my own busy schedule, I think everyone needs a change of routine every now and then. *nudge.. nudge...* |
peeping tom chapter 1 . 4/10/2006 Yup, another little tag along from . Have I told you recently that I love you? Really. Jericho's reaction to Tristram's appearance absolutely made my day. I noticed a minor inconsistency in Chapter 4. At one point, Jericho says that there are no working women in the town but earlier you said that the librarian is female. (Or else Tristram was lying when he told Jericho that he wasn't a homosexual...) Anyways, I'm expecting great things from you! I know that asking is futile, but try to work at some semblance of a steady pace for once, alright? The pain of waiting for you to update is pretty brutal, you know. ~Heather |
dress-without-sleeves chapter 5 . 3/23/2006 Oh, sad chapter! Really sad. I can't decide if I love or loathe Jericho, and Tristram is really growing on me. :D |
AuthorMan chapter 5 . 3/14/2006 Based on the layout of this chapter, would it be safe to assume that the next will have a fair amount of action in it? As I read this, I got the feeling that you wanted to fill the reader in on a lot of the background you might not've been able to work into the story earlier, or just hadn't wanted to. Then again, there was also a lot of new stuff to contend with, and, I felt, a chance to get a larger look at the plot in general, and maybe less focus on the 'mass grave' arc by itself. You also offered a little insight into Jericho's past, which, while welcome, gave me the uneasy feeling you might be approaching the gruff, 'my-family-and-I-met-some-awful-fate/fallout-and-now-I'm-a-hardened-old-cop' Bruce Willis template, so I hope I end up being wrong and that you surprise me, as usual. Without sounding critical, I think that overall this chapter kind of reminds me of the summarizations that come at the end of manuals or textbooks. On to some of the things I thought might've been a little lacking. One such matter were the secondary characters you used in this chapter, Galen and Anubis. I realize that you probably won't use them much again, if ever, but at the same time they still seemed a little stale. Their dialogue seemed generic in the sense that they were there only to fulfill a short purpose to the plot, and there wasn't much of a 'human' vibe coming off of them. In the future, you might look at the historical features of their personas to select their vocabulary, or simply push their own motives a bit more in there speech. Secondary characters are a bit of theater-style drama in a novel, in the sense that their communication with the 3D characters is their only real outlet. I also realize that you've probably heard this all before, probably did have those things in mind as you wrote them, and if I were speaking to you in person would adopt a very closed posture, but I just want to make sure my meaning comes across clearly. And I know I said a 'couple of things,' but I'm really straining to find faults in this story now. I'll keep trying, but it seems to be getting better with each chapter. My favorite part of this chapter was the connection of the getaway car from the last one and the undertaker's hearse in this one. I like the way it ties so well into the theme of the arc in general, and also how it gives the reader that little zen moment of 'oh, I see,' whereupon one realizes just how the big black car makes sense. Plus I like the mental image of a robber getting away in a hearse. It's pretty funny, go ahead and try it. To wrap this all up, I'd like to say that this a fine story, and one of the better ones I've come across on this site. This is definitely on par with the fantasy stories you come across in a book store. So keep writing this, and I'll keep reading , peace and goodbye. |
Mip the Demon Fox chapter 4 . 1/31/2006 For some reason or another the author alert didn't tell me about this update. I found it completely by accident, but I'm glad. Yet another good chapter and hopefully they'll tell me next time XD. |
AuthorMan chapter 4 . 11/29/2005 Hello, and welcome back. It's been a little while, but I'm always excited to receive an e-mail concerning my favorite authors. Anyway, I found this chapter to be very interesting. You've really given a lot of detail about the nature and orientation of the 'town,' and it's struck a chord with me. Supernatural mystery is a preferred genre of mine as I've so stated, and this chapter has provided what I've been hoping to see. Where will it go from here? Is the town itself a spectre, forever dwelling in the past? Is the 'presence' holding it there unwillingly, controlling the town directly? Or maybe it's more subversive, perhaps the people have fallen to insanity through means of paranormal influences, and all the computers, and all the technology, literature, and staples of our time have been destroyed, or maybe just hoarded away somewhere. Very interesting indeed. Its hard for me to look at the characters objectively anymore though, because I already feel attached to them, perhaps due to the manner of the publication. I wonder if the first readers of Great Expectations felt the same way? So, sadly, I will have to pass on that aspect untill I have a better idea of what I want to say. Critique-wise, I'm finding little to harp about. No glaring grammatical errors or inconsistencies (if any at all), and the story has begun to move out of the generalized exposition phase and into the more refreshing areas of the plot. I can't help but feel though, and don't take this the wrong way, but my mind is telling me that I've overlooked something. I'd probably have to reread from the start to tell you what it was, so it must not be too important. Oh well, moving on. This story may very well be one of the very few stories in all of , nay, the online amateur writing spectrum that has laid hands on that one, true holy grail: consistent. Characters (but don't let it go to your head, wink wink). Honestly, it's wonderful to be able to read a story where the brooding, self-serving anti-hero doesn't (melo)dramatically shift into a gracious and beatific hero throug the course of all of two thousand words. That may be exaggeration, but it's close enough. Also, good pacing. This plot runs at a good clip, with just enough action interspersed to keep me placated during the slower stretches of development. That isn't to say though, that I wouldn't like to see more of your action scenes. I'm impressed that you manage to keep those sequences in actual paragraphs, instead of broken double-spaced bombard-my-eyes-with-searing-white-pixelationmadness many writers seem to find appealing. And that's all I have to say. Actually, no. Wait just a second. You're brains are made of fish paste... I can only hope that will keep you're feasting ego in check untill I can once again offer some criticisms. Good to hear from you, and of course, peace out. |
QuicksilverDragonfire chapter 4 . 11/29/2005 Awesome...i think it sucks that you don't get near as many reviews on this as on your fanfic stuff...this stuff is excellent too! keep it up... The only thing i noticed is that Jericho is pretty...speechy...for lack of a better word...he just seems to me to be the kind of guy who would be a bit more reticent. Otherwise, great as usual! |
drabbleocity chapter 4 . 11/29/2005 Excellent. :D Jericho is so hardcore. Sad about the agents, though. -pauses a moment to shed a tear- And now ... Yeah. Definitely feeling the hole priest-who-killed-his-wife-and-son thing is somehow connected. Update sooN! :D |
drabbleocity chapter 3 . 11/25/2005 oh. I like. A lot. Jericho is so hard core. :P But seriously, I love this! I stalked you over here from (Chapter 18! Update! Squee!) and may be obsessed with this story. Maybe. And now for my millions of questions, because this is deliciously confusing. If natural's don't like afflicted, then why do they bite at all? And also, if an afflicted gets married and has a kid, will the kid be a natural? But, assuming naturals don't really like human beings, how will they reproduce? Or don't they? Or is it that one of the parents is just a regular wolf? (Ew.) Do afflicteds and naturals ever mate? All right, my bet is that Jane (she was the priest's wife, right? Men-whatsit?) and her kid were in the first mass grave found 100 years ago. And that whoever is haunting their house (assuming anyone is) is also the one who killed poor Stephanie Lake. And ... yeah. That's pretty much it. :P |
Mip the Demon Fox chapter 3 . 10/7/2005 Coming from your fanfiction over to this... it's different, but I like it. The characterization is amazing. Also, I read your post on fengs-shui and that *is* something of a downer XD. If it helps any, I can assure you that yours is much much much better than Darkwatch. Most of us gamers were very very dissapointed with it because it had not depth to it. That's something you most certainly aren't lacking. I'm looking forward to new chapters from...well, anything you're writing _. Hope to see you soon! |
AuthorMan chapter 3 . 9/20/2005 You're here, I'm here, and my long, self-important reviews are here. It's a party. The end of the exposition and the foray into the first real plot arc. The set-up for Tristram's and Jericho's bonding was well done, and I see this chapter leading into Tristram's coming to grips with his situation, which should be entertaining. Critiques I have: While the characters were well-written (notably the scene between the parents and the children; that certaintly made me reminisce), I couldn't help but feel as if some elements were a bit bit heavy on the... story formula. Now keep in mind, this is a light (emphasis) critique, so don't take this too seriously. While the whole Rickard-sweats-as-gate-falls-off-hinges-scene was funny, it seemed like something I might've seen in a movie once... or twice. I have that same problem more often than I'd like to admit, but I read this and see that you are already a great writer, and I want to see you become even better. That's all for that. Next: I really liked your description of the house and surrounding area, and also of the murders. It came off as very real, tangible in the neighborhood's case, and very visceral as pertaining to the bodies. Overall, splendid. It's spectacular to find you writing this again, and I eagerly await the next installment. As always, peace. PSThanks for adressing my concerns, by the way. I honestly had no idea that any branch of government or subsequent runoff would use the term 'level' (except possibly X-files -weak attempt at humor-). And now that I've read some more, I can see more clearly why you were hesitant to stick with first-person. It seemed a little choppy to go with the omniscient or limited, as the case may be, but this chapter read a lot more smoothly. You have opened my eyes; thank you. And one more; I apologize for the bit on Resident Evil; I know where you're coming from. The threat of plagiarizing or of being plagiarized poses a serious threat to any creator willing to submit their material to the masses. That was long, but so was your chapter (for which I am grateful). Double-peace. |