Nice job, I like the dark and gritty theme. Especially since it's about female empowerment and not so innocent and good. Oh at the end where you said I'm a women, I think you meant to say woman. That's all nothing big. Good work.

Wow, intense~~ Good work

keep writing!

Thought I'd check out some of your other work. This is violent and dark but I love the fact the woman has had enough and is now going to fight back. She's empowered. Violent but empowered. You made the very common your mistake here. I did it and then I joined this site and found out the difference. Your is if something belongs to somebody and the like. Your coat, your eyes, etc. You're is shorthand for you are. So if anytime in speach somebody puts You're it means you are. Any other time when the meaning isn't you are it's your. I don't know if you knew that already. But I think where you put "your gonna die I tell you" it should have been "you are going to die I tell you" (you're.) Sorry if you already knew that and I'm a rambling idot but it was just in case you didn't and I'm 17 and if nobody had told me I'd still be making the same mistake as the shameful early chapters of my stories prove. So, I hope that helped and you are not one of these people that hate long reviews. Hope you keep writing and more people check out your work. Luv Kaitx