Reviews for She was
Rob Roy '03 chapter 1 . 6/24/2006
Very nice work! Good niggling point:"-fine-"Should that be "-fin-"?Otherwise, great job.
Lellida chapter 1 . 9/18/2005
Wow, it's gorgeous! I love the last lines- they finish the poem off beautifully. One thing: for all of the other stuff after your poem, bolding it or underlining it or something would show the reader that it's not part of the poem and wouldn't trip up the reading. Or maybe put it in the beginning so that the reader can linger of the powerful ending a little longer. Just a thought- great poem!
MyHeart chapter 1 . 9/10/2005
I think the repitition makes the poem... pps... my whole rant some how didn't post on my last review.. allow me to finish... I didn't forget my own hypocrycy
breakdown in the waiting room chapter 1 . 8/31/2005
The first several beginning lines are a nice picture, but it seems rough. It could be edited, but the last three lines are perfect, and really make the piece. You have a knack for endings and getting your theme across, most people have a tough time with that. -jess
lovelikeamixtape chapter 1 . 7/18/2005
yeah, it is a lot of repetition but it works simply because of the last line- 'and as our eyes met, i realised that they were the most beautiful blue eyes i'd ever seen.' this is great work- i love how it establishes a stereotype and then breaks it down. good job.