Reviews for The Seal of Prayers
Strabo chapter 22 . 8/23/2011
Sorry, but this chapter was a little boring. Perhaps add an assassination attempt to liven things up? I'm a little confused about the secret village. It doesn't make sense that Caitlin would allow it, at least not unless she put one of her own in charge, or perhaps Jeris could suggest someone to infiltrate it.
Strabo chapter 21 . 8/22/2011
Good chapter. I think Reishenn is being too nice, but at least it is in character for her to be honorable. I hope Caitlin finds out which Goddess put the hit on her.
Strabo chapter 20 . 8/19/2011
This was a great chapter!

Only one thing I would change, and please don't take this the wrong way: The dream sequence is very weak, and reminds me of something out of a 1950's Tony Curtis movie. The reason your story is so compelling is because of your imagination, so please consider getting rid of the stereotype Zeus throwing thunderbolts from under a marble portcullis. Give us something unique and creative!
Strabo chapter 19 . 8/17/2011
Another good chapter, and improving with a little more descriptiveness (Nonami's uniform) and teasing us with the mystery of Caitlin: Is she an Ashfolk Lord or the Slayer or both?

The only thing I would suggest is tying Nonami in with earlier chapters about the Ashfolk. Maybe Jinso could play a role; after all he was not too happy about Ephemera either.
Strabo chapter 18 . 8/15/2011
Very readable and enjoyable chapter. I wouldn't change anything. But if you did, maybe Brian went down just a little too easy? Caitlin is still growing into her strengths and wrestling with her conscience, so Brian may have had a bigger opening to cause damage. Where is the elemental when all this is going down?
Strabo chapter 17 . 8/4/2011
One of the best chapters so far, not just because it explains a lot, but fleshes out some of the characters. A couple of points:

'The misses' should be written 'the Mrs.' short for Mistress.

There is an opportunity to tie Yarah's death into Brian's grudge against authority (unless that is covered later on.) Murdered by a Prince, perhaps?

Need to put us in the picture with a little more descriptive language in Middleton, such as men in heavy robes and robed woman.
Strabo chapter 16 . 8/2/2011
A little humor is a good thing, especially when it is used as a vehicle to reveal a plot complication. Is Brian's character based on Watto from Star Wars I?
Strabo chapter 15 . 8/1/2011
Two points: The stall tactic of Caitlin with The Slayer just doesn't seem believable. There should be some sort of fight that leads to a standoff before they are standing right next to each other. Also, What happened to Ephemera? I thought she had control of The Slayer.
Strabo chapter 14 . 7/28/2011
Another riveting chapter, and the story is moving along at a good clip. My only suggestion would be to tie in Ephemera somehow so it transitions from Chapter 12.
Ghost chapter 24 . 7/27/2011
WOW:

Ben a while,glad to see another chapter. Looks as though Cat is getting her back bone. Wonder what kind of crap hits the fan when she meets the king and trys to put her in a plush prison again.. Should be quite a show of wills. Plus now with the other factions going to hell and back. This should turn out an interesting next chapter. Be waiting...

Ghost
Strabo chapter 13 . 7/27/2011
Nothing to comment on. A good chapter that flows easily and teases the reader with a little more of Caitlin's mysteries. I'm just surprised the old man with the herbs didn't make a cameo appearance.
Strabo chapter 12 . 7/25/2011
Entertaining fight scenes, but overall the chapter is a bit confusing. Hopefully an explanation will emerge as to how souls, physical strength, and magical powers interrelate.
Book worm chapter 24 . 7/24/2011
Ok I stayed up reading this till 5 am last night not the wisest choice on my part but man I just hate Epherea or whatever her name is! I don't know why or if that was intended but she is cocky and obsessive and gosh I hope Asra doesn't love her although at the moment I'm not to happy with him either but if i feel she needs to be put in her place and am looking foreward to that happening. I can't wait till Catlin becomes all powerful and opens up more cans of kick *butt* I also hope she finds love what with everyone else finding happiness or having drama about love! My favorite characters have to be Catlin, marlena, Torren, and for a while intrigue with Asra before he went all newbie evil eventhough I knew he was evil but then he had to let whatsherface use Eterna's body and you just don't go there man especially if you're spying on her incarnate, oh I really hope he finds out about Epherea sending or wanting to kill her wow I really don't like her... I mean she brings out the worst in my malevolent thoughts about fictional characters but I really love your story!
Strabo chapter 11 . 7/19/2011
Despite the caveat in the author's notes, there should be at least a reference to the manner in which the dragon died, such as "she walked away from the smoking corpse..." because it leaves the reader feeling incomplete.

Also, a little more thought should go into the reunion with her mother. There should be a lot more inner conflict, perhaps expressing itself as an over-reaction to the guide.
Strabo chapter 10 . 7/18/2011
A good chapter, with enough plot turns to hold the readers attention. I'm hoping to see some non-combat interaction between spirits.
106 | « Prev Page 1 2 3 4 5 .. Last Next »