Reviews for lackluster
White Tea and Ginger chapter 1 . 9/25/2005
Well written. I love it. You brought it to life.
pneumothorax chapter 1 . 8/16/2005
Simples but good. Noticing a trend with the train references. 'CANNON/waiting for the/backfire' is a good end. Love the scenario.
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 8/6/2005
interesting and cool.. nicely done
Crucified Sanctity chapter 1 . 8/3/2005
Very odd poem. I liked the big words but only nearer the end.

gunpowder triggering nose hairs she just licks the remnants on the glass &

that line stuck out, i like its rhythym and flow :)

- Crucified Sanctity -
poetic abortion chapter 1 . 8/2/2005
being the immature snob I am I laughed while reading this line: "with a falsetto genderconfusedmale" - pefect image I had in mind. love, love the line. the poem over all is not your best due to the ending but was still very good.

~* noelle
mysticalfluff chapter 1 . 8/2/2005
Nice, I like your style.
GypsyMothra chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
Great imagery. Good emphasis with the CAPS too.
lackluster chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
"with a falsetto genderconfusedmale"-no idea why, but this line made me smile. yes, I am peculiar...

"she does remember when/she was actually/wealthy enough to buy/CRACK..."also a very interesting part in this poem.

i do think you could've made the ending a wee bit better: cannons just don't appeal to me i guess...but lovely overall! it tells such an intriguing tale.
godsandstars chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
very nice. very descriptive. i love it. great job.
in theory chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
Truly stunning, your style is eloquently gorgeous.
Falsetto chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
I love the raw quality of this poem and all of the flashes of imagery. It really pulls in the senses.
Nobody-n-Particular chapter 1 . 8/1/2005
I love the explosion of emotions, wonderful.