honestly the plot seems like it could be interesting but your writing for lack of something nicer to say,boring.

also this teacher seems to start feeling for her a little too soon. it doesnt seem like he even knows her well.

you should try to write more often so you can get better and you shiould rewrite the story.

Mm. I'm afraid I don't quite share everyone's feelings with this story.

For one thing, you really need to work on proper formatting. The way you did dialogue was odd, with the zeros and stuff. Also how you didn't do proper past-tense-saying he did stuff in present tense, without even mentioning he was doing it was very odd.

Also you need to watch out for how you write a word. Captalize the begining of every sentance and "I's-you should have learned that in grade school. o_o It's fine in chats, but you're writing, not chatting. .

As for the story itself... everything seems a bit too easy going. The girl's wonderful, and he seems happy he's falling in love. There should be more to it than that, don't you think? Hesitance and denial, ect. That's just my first impression, however.

Consider all sides to your characters. Their backround, how they view life and live it everyday. Their likes and dislikes... they're things you really need to think about in order to have them do stuff like talk, and especially fall in love and form bonds and friendships.

But these are just first impressions. Just a reminder if you may have strayed away from that, which was my impression, and is advice if you haven't even thought about anything like that at all.

Keep writing, and I hope this devlops into something good.

Great plot... AMkes me want to read more! Though you need to determine who is actually talking or performing what action... other then that, awesome write! Can you please check out my stuff on my site ( if you ever have time) ! Later ( your going on my alert list and story alert list!) _

heyhey... im liking the plot... it sounds sorta like onegai teacher in teh sense of the teacher/student thing. Also, you should check your spelling/grammar/punctuation... but besides that... i think that your fic is coming along nicely... D write more...D

Aw...gotta love those student/teacher things..haha Well I hope you update soon, its a cute story so I hope you do continue!

Tara

Oh, and if youd like chex out my story Feuer, wasser, luft, erde-there is a bit of student/teacher mishap there as well :P

Good storyline, but sometimes the writing can get a bit confusing if you don't actually say WHO is doing something. For example,

'Smiles when it was lunch'. Who smiles? 'Watches as everyone whispers'. Who watches?

Otherwise, it's a great story.

Ps. If you have time it would be great if you could check out some of my stuff too!