|Reviews for Swing Girls|
| Musicfreak77 chapter 4 . 1/15/2012
So far, this story is rather interesting. I like how you are using the first person point of view. Usually when I read stories that are not in first person, it turns out to be more like a list. But instead, you went deeper and took the time to write out the character's thoughts and his emotions in certain situations.
The plot itself is definitely unique and interesting, what really caught my attention was the idea of the girls’ interest in 1939. I cannot help but wonder why these girls love that time, so I will be keeping my eye on this story.
I have noticed a few things that may need to be pointed out. At one point, the story was written in past tense and then present, like in the chapter 'Suburbia'. It can at times confusing to the reader if you change it on them. So I would suggest sticking to only one.
Also, when there is a lot of dialog, it may be helpful to explain what the person is doing during that time. For example, in the chapter 'Hobby or Cult?’ the beginning has a lot of dialog between the characters. It was enough to get me a little confused at times of who was speaking and what they were doing. If you add more than (for example) 'Lola said' or 'Valerie smiled', it'll help the reader picture the scene in their mind. Now you don't have to do this with every piece of dialog, just every now and then, to help the reader picture it.
There were also a few minor grammar mistakes in the dialog in the first few chapters, where there was a period instead of a comma.
Overall, this is a really good story; I'll be looking forward to the next chapter.
| Scarlette Jane Catherine chapter 3 . 7/22/2008
I like the premise of this story, it's different and well written. But I'm rather confused about your terming of "swing girls" obviously from "swing kids". Swing kids were German teens during the Nazi years who opposed to Nazi ideology and favoured American and British styles. How are your characters swing kids. But over all a neat story.
| pinkfluffyoranges chapter 3 . 12/13/2007
Oh man this story is GREAT! Why didn't you keep up with it. It was silly of me to read when I could see you hadn't updated in a very long time, but I couldn't help myself. It just seemed so interesting, completely different to anything else here on fictionpress. But now I'm hooked, I want to know all the secrets! So I hope you pick this story back up, because it is far to be good to be forgotten. Hope to read more from you in the future.
| Wesley Kelly chapter 3 . 12/8/2006
I had almost forgotten about this story, but in my extreme need to avoid studying, I began some more exploring of the new site and rediscovered this story. I still like it a lot, and it is really interesting. Hope to see more of it soon.
| kelsi bones chapter 3 . 7/26/2006
Don't give up on this, I really like it. Very cool idea; good luck with it!
| Misty Moonweb chapter 3 . 7/21/2006
What an awesome story you have so far! I love the Swing Era! I always wished that I could live in that time. I'm about to start my own club! Update soon _
| UndiscoveredLiterati chapter 3 . 7/21/2006
I'm completely fascinated this story. I actually read part of it before but didn't review because I had assumed you had given it up. I'm glad to see you didn't- I can't wait to read more!
| Wesley Kelly chapter 2 . 5/14/2006
I really like this story and I'd really love to see what comes up next. Update... please.
| micahmouse chapter 2 . 3/17/2006
yay for another chapter. I'm still enjoying this story and I'm excited to see where she takes him. Thanks for updating.
| the-beautiful-tragedy chapter 2 . 2/8/2006
what a crazy idea. I've heard vaguely of this concept of Swing. I really like it and your writing is good. Quite original. Keep with it.
| kamma7292 chapter 2 . 2/8/2006
I love it! It's wondefu so far, and I'd LOVE to see more.
| saxgoddess chapter 1 . 2/8/2006
sounds interesting! can't wait to read more!
| JojoAnn chapter 1 . 1/6/2006
haha. sounds good.
| Classic-Tragedy16 chapter 1 . 11/26/2005
Ooh this sounds really interesting. i like reading about this time era and ive heard about the swing kids before. update soon, im really interested!
| micahmouse chapter 1 . 8/16/2005
I love this concept. I can't wait to see where it goes. Very good writing.
Small spelling note. Actually, I think this was probably a typo, but you put rogue where I'm very sure you meant rouge.
Brava! Can't wait for more. :)