Reviews for The Obsession with Jack |
---|
![]() ![]() ![]() Very cool song. Cept I felt that the two lines: "You charmed me stupid and you made me wake up,You made me change me then you made us break up," Might flow a little better if they were: "You charmed me stupid and you woke me up,You made me change me then you broke us up." But that's just me being weird. OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I'm a counsellor Idealist! (I love personality tests) That's so freaky. I know, it sucks. But that explains a lot a lot. *Collapses in chair* I get way to into these things. But yes, I'm a counsellor idealist. And it explains so much. No, Cleo's so stupid... *Groans* Okay, I'm trying to work this out... *scrunches face* you updated on the 1st... and now it's the 18th... so you should update soon, right? *Looks hopeful* Screw A-levels. Hehehe. Actually, I need to go and revise. Please update soon! *Begs* Awesome story, keep writing! |
![]() ![]() ![]() "Harold and his incredible chins would have to wait until tomorrow." Hahahaha. I'm beginning to fall in love with this Jack fella myself! *Sigh* Not again... Oh, nicely written - the whole bit with the website and the phone call. Very very nice. Don't ask me why. Hahaha, Vinnie Jones' son goes to my brother's school. In case you were interested. :D "Jack was looking for exactly the same things that I was." Ooh, goosebumps again. "If I wasn’t careful, I told myself, I might turn out like her some day." Oh. Ahaha, I have the patience of a saint. *Tries to look saintly and fails miserably* |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh, that is a patronising detention task. Hateful hateful people. Oh god, he's back. That's Tom, btw. Oh, I understand the July thing. Jack could be Rosie's July! Oh. "I told myself, that I might just be in the process of finding my very own July. Oh dear." I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT! I really do need to get a life. I like the sort of surreal dimension to this story, it's awesome. Very very cool. When Tom said, "He was like you," I swear I almost got goosebumps. *Claps* One more chapter. I feel so guilty. |
![]() ![]() ![]() "I didn’t even bother to mentally comment on that one." HAhahahaha. Tom is an idiot. I can't quite make him out, but he makes me uneasy. *Laughs* I carried on reading after I'd typed that just to see that later in the paragraph it says "Tom was an idiot." I can read your mind... Wow, you managed to make a shy person walking out actually realistic. Awesome. Vairy vairy interestink. Must read on... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hahahahahahhaa, I remember making those apples in middle school! *Reminisces* It's so true... they DO look sad. My hormones are unbelievable. So I can totally relate to this. I take it this is the "present" again... I'm intrigued. I really want to know what's happened! Nice way to structure it- swinging between the two. Coolios. Keep writing! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Tillie is unbelievably trippy! She's really unpredictable... I'm a little bit scared of her. I don't like meeting up with strangers either... even friends I haven't known for long freak me out. I had the Sex and the City ringtone, btw, before I changed phones. Hehe. Awesome chapter again! I think I have time for one or two more, then I really have to go do some revision. This sucks. Argh. |
![]() ![]() ![]() The song is really cool. Oh no, I have to have things straight too! It drives my driving instructor crazy, because whenever I bay park, I have to go right to the end of the row and then reverse for ages. She thinks I'm crazy. *Giggles* Oh, interesting... NOt much to say about this chapter. Awesome still though. Keep writing! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I've reached new lows. I'm eating salsa on its own. Not with a spoon or anything - I'm licking it off my finger. *Sigh* I need to get out more. Oh, I love the line "The saddest ever optimist" that's really cool. :D I agree about the "does fun have to be sophisticated or slutty all of the time now?" I can relate. Although thankfully, me and my friends still make cakes, and have water fights, and go and play on the swings in the park. It rules. Oh, she's taking an Egburt CD. I sense plot developments vis-a-vis the mysterious Jack... (I'm reviewing as I go, in case you hadn't noticed. Hehe.) Oh, and sorry I've got no CC so far. I haven't been able to find anything yet. :D I'm onto my second bag of crisps. *Looks guilty* "I’d learnt to like scampi, after all – and if anything’s difficult to like, it’s fish." You gotta love the way her mind works. :D Oh, I hate that- when you want to be alone and then someone comes over and you get all that 'I have to make effort to make coversation' thing. Ooh. OMG I LOVE LLAMAS! *Does a little llama dance* My desktop is actually a llama called Theodore. *Blushes* He's a gay-gothic-upperclass-llama with issues. But he's good to vent to. I hate the pussy cat dolls. And Tillie intrigues me. Wow, that was a trippy chapter... *Looks dazed*... I'm so confused... Hehe. I have to keep reading! *pouts* |
![]() ![]() ![]() OMG, I saw some of rock school! My brother's friend has the DVD, I may have to "borrow" it and find you. Hehehe. Oh, I have the hips too... *Sigh* It's so true. You can't suck in bone. It sucks. *Giggles* Oops. Wow, she really does have family issues. Makes me feel kinda thankful. I'm actually sitting here eating Salt and Vinegar crisps, hehe. With salsa. Yum. But I couldn't agree more - plain crisps are pointless. OMG, I'm vegetarian too! *Sits in awe* We have frubes in our fridge too. Hehehehe. Strawberry cheesecake... oh god... I know for a fact that we have no decent comfort food in the house. You know why? Because I've already eaten it all. Cillit bang... I can still remember the advert... *Sigh* I love all the british references. Hilarious. I'm intrigued by Jack... Must read on... I've decided that this is my lunch break. Well, the beginning of it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hahahahaha, the song was really funny, I thought it was a bit dodgy. But then I thought maybe that was just me interpreting it strangely... How do you write these relationships so well? I can really relate to what she has with Jennie and Mia- sort of, anyway. I can understand it. I don't have any friends like that exactly, but it's written so realistically... I can really relate to the 'not fitting into conversation' thing though. And the nerves thing. Some people just don't get that. Very cool chapter. Will read on now. Despite AS level revision that is calling to me from upstairs. I'm on a break. *Continues making excuses* |
![]() ![]() ![]() Your characters are so real! And I don't know, somehow so English. Hehe. I'm not sure why, but they do, expecially after reading loads of american fiction. Again - Rosie's so real, it's amazing. And somehow, she manages to come off sounding a little depressed without the story itself being depressing. Very well written atmosphere. Me likie. Keep writing! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Somehow I completely missed this chapter the first time I read through! It still made sense though... *Scratches head*... but the Tom thing makes more sense now. He's really unusual by the way, I'm intrigued. I can see bits of people I know in him, but I don't really know anyone exactly like him. Which is awesome. I can really relate to a lot of Rosie. Really. She often seems quite... what's the word... bleak? If that makes sense? But I like that she's not a stereotype. It's awesome. Cleo bugs me. And the whole 'I had classmates who were getting fifty pounds for every pass they got.' I KNOW! How unfair is that! Albeit, my parents did give me money for my GCSEs, but damn, if it had been for passes... *Grumbles* It's not that bad though, I spose. My straight A friend's parents said they'd give him £200 for every subject he failed. Hahahaha. Awesome chapter, I really like Rosie. She's very real. And the song, did you write it? It's really cool. *Blushes* I actually googled egburt 2 to see if they were real, only to get fictionpress links. *Sigh* i'm such a loser. |
![]() ![]() ![]() This story rocks! (I'm up to chapter four, but I had too much to say to fit into one review. Typical. I'll do chapter by chapter.) I love the first line. :D "I eat a grape. I don’t even like grapes." Hehehehe. This is the coolest plot EVER. How did you come up with it? It's genius! And I take it that this is after the rest of the plot... I've forgotten the fancy technical name for that... but yeah... it's really cool. Nice first chapter - not too long (It's good for a first chapter to be short imo) What did she do! *Growls* Awesome chapter. |
![]() ![]() ![]() OMG! It is so cool to finally read a GOOD story by a british author! I've been missing the 'u' in colour for way to long! A-levels, :: sighs :: man, I have no idea why i'm feeling so nostalgic, I'm still doing them! I embrace your random british referances and I love this story! Sorry about the random typos, i'm getting a bit over excited! Please update soon, I wanna meet Jack! |
![]() ![]() ![]() weird . . . songs Hiro : *sweat* . . . *then laughs hysterically and desperately creating a tune on the head* A light story, humor-packed by nevertheless has the qualities of a great written piece. I like the dialogues that flow almost naturally. It's easy to relate. I do music for my songs, specifically for my original fiction, some kind of an Original Soundtrack _ (*but not weird ones lol*), but I'm poor at lyrics so I get other people do my lyrics. Hey, but at least you did fine . . . for this particular genre that is. First person POV worked well, although sometimes they don't flow consistently. Some lines are not as powerful as the one before, so check that out especially if only one person is talking. Changing styles when using first POV tend to confuse, mind you. *smiles up to my ears* Take care, hiro-0911 |