Reviews for McFuture
MyNameIsLucyWatt chapter 1 . 9/27/2016
Fatso's husband probably divorced her and then moved to an alien planet. And married a beyond hawt, beautiful, and sexy alien woman (who looked like a Victoria's Secret model) and had a bunch of beautiful alien babies and Victoria's Secret Alien lady he married kept her figure even after she gave birth to her litter (the alien women from Victoria's Secret alien woman's planet give birth to 2-8 kids at a time) of cute beyond what any human child could ever be kids. Hell Fatso's husband probably even gives the Victoria's Secret Alien woman all the sex she wants because she's not a mountain or lard, obesity, colestral, fatass, grease, butter, and FUGLY UGLY like Fatso is!
As for Fatso and her kids, he could care less about them because Fatso's Husband is livin the dream with HAWT, BEAUTIFUL, and SEXY Victoria's Secret model alien woman on her home planet beaumondea (where even the fat people (which there aren't very many of BTW) are movie star, popstar, and model HAWT, BEAUTIFUL, and SEXY AF). On the beach in a beach house with their 8 children (and 9 and10 are on the way!)
Emo chapter 1 . 4/17/2013
Ahahaha, I'm so glad I came across this! The secret ingredient was human, who would've thought of that!? You, my friend are a genius. ;)))
Claudia Steele chapter 1 . 8/13/2010
This story just made you one of my favourite authors. I hate McDonalds with a passion but probably will have to work there at some point in the near future.

To your story:

To me, this is a futuristic version of the tale of Sweeney Todd, the demon barber of fleet street.

Also it remind me of a horror story that was told by people living under domination of the third reich in which a butcher was getting free meat supplies from concentration camps and a boy found out about it when he found a human nail in some pate he was eating. Of course I am not sure as to how much of this is rooted in reality. It's just that the fingernail incident in your story made me think of this.

Overall this is very well written. It's quirky (which is a good thing). I love the reference you make to Burger King and KFC and their staff decisions.

I think the usage of the 'bing bong' sound is excellent, as it give the reader a very realistic impression of what the day of a McDonalds employee is like.

I like that this is a rather simple story with a simple structure that is easy to read and has the potential to make the reader smile, yet melts into a horrific end twist painting a rather grim vision of the future.

I enjoyed this story a lot.
firemounrain chapter 1 . 1/2/2009
Omg, that was awesome.

I wonder- is it true that a realistic projection of the future is invariably scary?
Eyes Unclouded chapter 1 . 8/13/2007
Nice...and scary! Yes, I can definitely tell you work at McDonalds, and I think that gave the story great details, like the comments on Windows 1 and 2 and the "Bing bong." Very creepy, but in some twisted way, I could imagine this happening in real life, although would they really kill him then and there? Then again, there seems to be an air of complacency in the future... A great first short story from you, with a good first-person voice and a real feel for the world you've created.
Katiefoolery chapter 1 . 11/10/2006
That was very entertaining. I loved the mixture of humour and horror and that girl who just drove up to ask questions before driving off again.

And yes - I did rather get the impression that you wrote from experience for much of that. :D
rrmehta364 chapter 1 . 6/11/2006
"No gene can withstand Window 1." : most hilarious.

"“Man flesh,” she said dramatically." : I knew it all along!

Very funny. I sort of expected the twist, but it was well done. I like how it went from funny to serious.

I think I'll be working at a place like McDonalds soon. Its rather depressing.

Well, as always, wonderfully written. Looking forward to reading more.

Wherrtle Smyth chapter 1 . 6/10/2006
Pretty creepy... probably not far from the truth either. I'm proud to say I haven't eaten at Mickeydees in over a year. However, (plot hole alert) don't you think they would protect the secret from reaching their employees a little more? I mean, wouldn't they have the vat at another location so they wouldn't be forced to kill their employees when they decided to barge into the kitchen like this character did? Besides that inconsistency, I enjoyed this story, especially the main character's sarcastic narration. Hopefully with more people writing stories like this, the world won't become populated only by McDonald's Fatties.
silverbluu chapter 1 . 5/4/2006
Freaky and stomach twisting. I was hungry until I read this, now I feel a little sick. Very good creation of monotony. It gets a little predictable after the narrator hears the rumor from the girl though. Still very chilling and unsettling
Kaggr chapter 1 . 4/19/2006
Funny funny. I do believe I'll avoid McDonalds at all costs now...Ew. I liked the end, it was very sudden...although if he was thrown into the vat, then how did he write it? o.O; Ah well. xD Just a stupid remark from me.
SinCorazon chapter 1 . 3/24/2006
Oh My God

I just finished eating McDonalds...chicken nuggets and a McFlurry.

That's so freaky and creepy, wow, what a coincidence too.
Dragen Eyez chapter 1 . 3/8/2006
that was, quite frankly, creepy.

i am ever so glad i don't eat McDonalds (okay, so once in a blue moon i eat some fries, but those're fries, not burgers) ew... I guess it'd be a good way to get rid of criminals and the dead?

A-Hard-Days-Night chapter 1 . 3/5/2006
That was completely original! I loved it!

I actually wouldn't be surprised if it ended up being true, knowning McDonald's.

Keep writing because this was brilliant! *Adds to favourites*
SpawnMeister666 chapter 1 . 1/29/2006
I like this. It's suitably bizarre enough to keep my attention, and also serves as a reminder of why I dislike McDonalds so much!

I'm extremely proud of the fact I managed to spend 7 months in America without resorting to going to McDonalds even once!

Anyway, I couldn't find anything wrong with this, it's well paced and written, and the twist at the end is the kind of thing I'd probably come up with!

Top marks from the SpawnMeister!

Boadicia chapter 1 . 1/11/2006

I love the casual voice of your narrator, revealing aspects of this future world piece by piece, and the little details you give the reader that make you sound like you really know what you're talking about. I like the "bing-bongs", and I really do get the idea that you worked in a McDonalds. :)

My only suggestion is that the ending, while certainly twisty, was a tad predictable. Once the narrator learned what the burgers were made of, I saw the end coming. Maybe if you cut out the part about the girl who warns him and just have him find the fingernail, it would be more of a surprise.

Altogether funny and frighteningly credible.
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