Hmm. Looks like I'm your first reviewer for this, then! So...yeah. That was pointless. On to the actual review.

Interesting! One thing, though-why does this remind me of Buffy the Vampire Slayer? You might want to think about that a bit...

Oh, well. Nice grammatics (forgive me if I just made up a word, there), punctuation, etc.

One thing that you might want to look at in the way of technicalities is explained at the link below:

. ?storyid1942775&chapter3

Hope that this review helps, somewhat. Good luck with this!

- Eyetk