The best story ever! You are a great writer, and I do not say this to everyone, not even close friends. That is just how nasty I am. Anyway, hope you do a last little story about them, after the sequel Redemption! It is such a waste if you don't!

I noticed that in the beginning of the story you hinted that Calen would have children in the future, yet in the end he died... was there suppose to be a different ending?

While this story has quite a number of structural and spelling errors the sheer tragedy of the plot is enough to keep me clicking on the [next] button. I would suggest a beta if you don't alr have one.

Loved the story, especially towards the ending. the Angst was enuff to rip my heart out and the romance enuff to stuff it back in. Keep up the good work!

(name said it all)

this chapter actually made me cry...

really sad

but on the good hand it was (as was the whole storie) very skillfully writen with mutch details and i know that some people could really live themselves into this

The truth of it is, I just don't think it's very believable for the Shikkart Clan to die as easily as that. They already knew the King was going around killing nobles, even if they were very lax about their security, rumours like that should have forced them to post watches just so they have enough warning to escape. Also, they're assassins right? I would assume they're the best? It's TOTALLY NOT BELIEVABLE that they all died because they were asleep. The night is the assassin's haven, it's just NOT BELIEVABLE that a couple of king's guards could have gotten the better of them.

I repeat, totally, NOT BELIEVABLE!

as much as i love this story i HATE that calin died i feel it could of had a bigger impact with him living. Havent read the second yet so ill see how that goes not sure im as excited though since calin died and i guess id hope that with all the magic darian has he'd be able to bring him back

amazing!

Calen can't be dead! You said that he was to have a son! (Which is odd in it's self. A gay guy having a son.)

What are you planning?

If you bring him back, your last paragraph becomes invalid.

~The Critic, Zoa

*rolls eyes* He knows he's in love with Darian, but he doesn't know who he dreams about?

Talk about idiots.

You've made Calen the perfect uke, havent you.

~The Critic, Zoa

*smirk* I liked that little show of power. Perfectly justified disposal.

~The Critic, Zoa

Wow. So much has happened in such a short time.

I like:

1. The plot is amazing. I rarely know what to expect.

I didn't like:

1. Calen is 18. He's a man, yet you've him acting like a little boy. He's afraid of Darian, who's not much older than himself. It's like reading about a 12-year-old.

2. You're not using imagery.

O_O Wasn't expecting that...

Hm... Is his magic gone forever, or is it just being sealed?

We'll see.

When's Darian going to step in?

~The Critic, Zoa

Hell yes! *jumps around laughing*

And THAT'S how they meet. I wonder how this will unfold.

~The Critic, Zoa

Interesting. We're finnally getting somewhere.

*frowns* I wonder...

You only discribed the man's eyes. *glares* It makes things very frustraiting.

~The Critic, Zoa

*mouth twitches into a smile* Okay, I'm completely with Darian on the brainless twit comment (though I could take that offensively).

You've made some interesting fangirls. Why? *snorts* Why you have to torture him I'll never know.

~The Critic, Zoa