Reviews for Halfbites and Hilights
theoretically beautiful chapter 1 . 2/8/2007
Kimiko's Cousin chapter 1 . 6/28/2006
Ooh...this wins the tingles-up-and-down-the-spine award! *fave*
Aneliz Rei chapter 1 . 6/26/2006
no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 4/28/2006
OMG, that was amazing. Someone commented that your writing is like a drug, and it is, b/c it's so damn addicting! This is a very dizzying poem, but with the subject, that's a good thing. I have no idea how you managed to accomplish this, but it's wonderful, and I thought of a friend of mine who went through an eating disorder when I read this. Amazing. Great work. Keep writing! :)
from beneath the bell jar chapter 1 . 1/12/2006
I love the way you worded the story here. "she's still not perfect yet" I loved that. Beautifully worded - it's so weird tho, because I'm writing an anorexia poem right now...anyway, great piece.
Lines To Time chapter 1 . 12/18/2005
I love the way the rhyming seemed to add another layer to the poem- an almost sarcastic edge, somewhat bitter but with the beginnings of a smirk. And yet it was wonderfully empathetic, as if you knew exactly what the girl was feeling (which I hope you don't). Really great job. I love to see talented, intelligent people cover topics that could be so cliched otherwise.
les petits bateaux chapter 1 . 12/16/2005
Amazingly written. The rhymes were thought-provoking, and beautiful. Your descriptions were vivid which is very good in a poem like this.
the naked civil servant chapter 1 . 11/30/2005
oh my god that is amazing. jesus CHRIST.
dollface and her cancer chapter 1 . 11/29/2005
"Throws it up and sits it up". Flowing, clever wordplay.
The Watched chapter 1 . 11/27/2005
Just...raw. Truthful and raw.

Just one thing though - 'hilights' is spelt 'highlights'. Unless it's for dramatic effect, I suppose.
hoowdoideletethisaccount chapter 1 . 11/25/2005
This is a great poem, although some of the lines don't make sense to me "shes throws it up and sits it up"-? Some of it is so clear and "wham!" and emotionally powerful, and some of it is imagery-ed into ambiguity :D So, yeah, I didn't understand all of it.

But I liked it. Especially the lines in italics. And especially, especially the first one. "and -she's still not perfect yet-" Man, sad. Good.
Chandra-Moon chapter 1 . 11/24/2005
This is excellent, everything about it: the way you portray the skinny, bulimic girl who is never good enough for herself. Your writing is exquisite, your rhythms are perfect, it has such a feel with the rhyming and the beat.

To summarize: good poem, I enjoyed it. keep writing.

(oh: "and she's still not perfect yet." A simple line, but did wonders to the poem. I don't know why, but it was meaningful to me.)
simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 11/20/2005
i love that last line.. great poem
White Tea and Ginger chapter 1 . 11/17/2005
The imagery and word choice and entire twisted theme here is great. It really brings this poem to life. Or death, perhaps- it seems that's where this girl is headed to.

As always, this is a fabulous piece.

Keep writing!
Frosted Midnight chapter 1 . 11/16/2005
this is interesting...i like it
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