Reviews for You stand by the window with black lips
Darcia Plushie chapter 1 . 1/3/2006
that's some deep shit right there.
Biting My Nails chapter 1 . 12/30/2005
Outdone yourself again! I like the feel of this whole peom, pieces given to the reader at different times. I enjoyed this piece, I want to cry.
thursdays and rain chapter 1 . 12/29/2005
beautiful. wow. this is going on my faves c:
jenifer ayrs chapter 1 . 12/25/2005
wow, very cool!
backseats on thursdays chapter 1 . 12/11/2005
... wow.
Brittany Studer chapter 1 . 12/4/2005
Wow! Love the format, it's great and takes you on an emotional journey; very gripping. You're very talented with words.-best wishes, Brittany
Gilee7 chapter 1 . 12/3/2005
-like the remainder/and the reminder- I like that play on words.

-and lets my eye lids droop while I work- "eyelids" is just one word, not two.

-and I couldn’t stop starring at your black lips- *staring*

-You ask/and my lips quake/earth shattering/shake- Heehee, me likes.

-I miss it like/I miss you/and your cold fingers/inside of me.- Oh, you dirty, dirty girl you!

-We’re monochromatically damned spirits- I really like that.

-and there’s no pain on your face anymore/but I still trace the line of you/to try and find the beginning/(which I never do)- That's probably one of my favorite parts of the poem.

-and I think, shit she was right- LOL. I laughed out loud when I read that line. It's all because of the word "shit." It was just so unexpected that it was hilarious. I love the facial expression I saw when reading that line.

-and the smoke/the fills the air- Seems to be an error there.

This is one of my favorite poems that I've read by you, which is really saying something because you're insanely talented. But wow, this one was impressive. I love long poems anyway. And this one was long, and yet it never dragged. It was powerful, emotional, sensual, clever, intelligent, and a million other words.

A lot of your work is very sexual, and this piece definitely was. There are so many clever lines, like the way you did the whole "cliff" deal, with each letter on a different line. And there are so many other things about this that made me go "wow" when I read it, even things I didn't paste in this review. I love the leather part and the smoke on the walls bit. The imagery in this was 5-star. And the rhythm, too.

I'm amazed at the magnificent job you did on this.

And I'm adding you as a Fave Author, which I should've done in the past because I've always been impressed with your stuff, but this poem was the clincher.
The-Original-Neko chapter 1 . 11/28/2005
again great work
Moppish chapter 1 . 11/25/2005
That was...long. I'm one to talk, I've written poems that are two pages typed, with two rows on each page. But anyways, this was rather long, considering it was a dream. And it had the broken nonsensical but powerful essence of a dream.

I'm surprised that you only rated this T, as there is some rather mature stuff in here, if you know what to look for.

The word choice in your imagery is incredible. It makes the reader feel and see everything you describe. Keep writing.
Damaged chapter 1 . 11/23/2005
Wow. That must've been some dream to inspire such a deep, powerful poem. I totally enjoyed reading this! AWesome job! I loved how you spaced certain lines, especially when you wrote "cliff" vertically-awesome effect-keep up the great writing!
Tisiphone-Scarlette chapter 1 . 11/23/2005
I love this poem! It is very well thought out and I think that it is very true and honest... Nice job!Tess*PS Thanks for commenting on my poem!
FlameintheFlood chapter 1 . 11/22/2005
wow. all i can say. wow. its a beautiful and frightening and confusing story. so much emotion. i liked the different linelengths i can tell u didnt stop to think about what u were writing but just put it on the paper. lovely.
White Tea and Ginger chapter 1 . 11/22/2005
Haunting.
Frozen Darkness chapter 1 . 11/22/2005
beatiful.. I'm enchanted by your words.. I especially like your words on silencing.. -Michi
starwatcher chapter 1 . 11/22/2005
Very very good imagery. Impressive.
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