|Reviews for The Fallen|
| Arcfall chapter 2 . 12/1/2005
Hahehehehah! Hoho. Hee. Sorry about that, Spirit. Had to get it out of my system.
Hey, I bet you can predict my reaction!
I sincerely applaud thy astounding skills as an author; and a storyteller, to be more exact. Exquisite!
Especially, in my humble opinion... your characters. Indeed.
I can never hope to match you, can I? You're meant for -something- special, m'dear, but what, I don't know.
| brevis chapter 2 . 11/22/2005
written as well as your last, if not better. more puzzles, it seems.
| Asharadoth chapter 2 . 11/21/2005
You have truly captured the scene, painting an incredibly vivid, absorbing picture of the arena; I could really centre myself in the story, and see everything with wonderful clarity.
I think you leave just enough unspoken to pique the reader's interest. Much unsaid can be inferred, but there is still more we don't know. Very tantalizing.
One complaint I have is that all the text is centred; left-alignment is better in general, except for headings and things that you particularly want to stand out. The "KILL!" looks good centred, but it makes the rest of it look amateurish - which your writing decidedly is not.
There were a handful of spelling errors in this chapter, but I'm not in the habit of pointing out each one. Getting a friend or relative to check your writing over would help there. Checking your own writing doesn't always work, because writers tend to read past their own mistakes without noticing them.
But otherwise - simply exquisite. This is going in my favs.
| Asharadoth chapter 1 . 11/21/2005
Aside from a couple of fragmented sentences, and the whole chapter being centred, instead of just your poem, this ... was absolutely wonderful.
Your prose is beautiful, and flows extremely well, and I found the opening poem especially poignant.
The descriptive passages were flowery and artistic without being overdone, which is quite difficult to carry off. It lent a marvellous, aesthetic feel to the whole thing.
This prologue seems like a conclusion, but I suppose I'll have to read on to find out. Of course, I wouldn't mind reading more of this - I can already see you're an extraordinarily talented author.
| brevis chapter 1 . 11/19/2005
beautifully written with all the right questions hanging. good job.
| Shadowz the Silver Wolf chapter 1 . 11/19/2005
This is a very interesting beginning. I can't wait to read more. ~Silver