|Reviews for Terminus ad quem|
| beti213 chapter 1 . 6/11/2006
wow. I'm not going to bore you with another one of my dissections, but my favorite phrases here are "I begged you to stay illustrated" "sense by sense you fall away" and the idea of wearing the end of something like a crown-being proud of it. gorgeous. bravo.
| Niniel Uskglass chapter 1 . 1/1/2006
Nice. I read all your poems and am reviewing this one. By the way, thanks for your review, I too get sick of "without you I am nothing" poems and refuse to read them. Is it just me or are all your poems on the same person/subject? I know several of mine are, and it seems the same for you. I especially like the line "atrophy to apathy" you'd never think of saying it like that, but it is completely true and really works. I like how you say "would wear it like a crown", it is a really poignant last line. I also like your use of quotes throughout your poems. In each case, I think you've used them well. As well as "blue". It's in each poem you've written (which makes me think they're all connected) and is perfect to describe the feelings in the poem. I must confess my lack of latin skills, I do not know what "terminus ad quem" means I'm guessing "end and ..." but you're right it does sound cool! I also like how you play with the metaphor of "illustrated" in the first two or three lines. I like the way the entire poem flows, as do your others. Keep it up.
| gogodiscodancer chapter 1 . 1/1/2006
beautifully written. its unique, something that stays with the reader. great work!
| amavian chapter 1 . 12/22/2005
Juicy and abstract - this is the kind of poem that makes you want to sink your teeth into it and just devour.
“I begged you to stay illustrated” I think beg(ged) is such a powerful word especially used in the contexts of ones self. Staying illustrated: wanting someone to stay as you think they are rather then who they actually are or need to be.
“Would make us the car crash you always wanted” I see mangled bodies and crunched up cars (powerful metaphor) you wanted the destruction so that you could see that together (between the two of you) there would never be construction.
I’m totally rhyming and over analyzing. I like your work. Its distinctive, it doesn’t try too hard. It’s unique.
| Moondog Dozier chapter 1 . 12/20/2005
alliteration works well here. the lines flow with the sound well, like "Down a blurred barrel into your tear stained blues". " Would make us the car crash you always wanted", is a great line. Tells a lot more than the actual words. " atrophy breeds apathy", is also a good wordtwist. You have a way with weaving words that creates a bigger picture for the reader.
| BJ Worth chapter 1 . 12/19/2005
Very well written poem. Had the right blend of abstraction and imagery to catch the attention.