Reviews for Coupons for People with Expired Personalities |
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![]() ![]() ![]() i really enjoyed this! great title. i love the theme of this poem and the tone is perfectly sarcastic. you conveyed the theme very, very, well. love fromVB |
![]() ![]() ![]() wow, i really liked the stanza about buying jesus for 12.99...and um as i was reading it, i'd noticed you'd mentioned that it was system of a down inspired so "lost in hollywood" was sort of going through my head as i read it and then i was like...crepy because that's what you were listening too as well... i'd appreciate it if you check out my stuff sometime |
![]() ![]() ![]() What an interesting concept... I really like it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow, this is really good, I love the concept you have. Since you want cc I'd have to say the only thing I didnt like was "we’re having a next sale next Saturday" It seems...I dont know, not worded right. Maybe the instead of a. and I think it would be better "on" saturday not "next" Saturday because the two nexts together make my tounge jumble when I say it out loud. But, brilliant job! |
![]() ![]() ![]() "Well, I found Jesus for only $12.99/and let him keep the change/(he looked like he needed it)." You're a genius. I love this. |
![]() ![]() ![]() the title and the writing is great. love that underlining of deeper meanings you have incorporated with this and the reference to jesus made me smile. my only criticsm would be that i found the third stanza a bit repetitive. |
![]() ![]() ![]() this is a GREAT piece. i love it. in fact, i'll add it. the only line i dont like is 'we're having a next sale next saturday' because the 'nexts' are too close... but still. also, there are too many 'things' in the second stanza... (i get really panicked by that sort of thing lol!) anyway, this would make a great song! |