|Reviews for Nestorian|
| Around.about chapter 1 . 3/7/2006
I see nothing but in your work it was you are and it is nothing to be ashamed of
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 1/28/2006
this is very cool.. i liek the whole father thing.. great job
| SarahJaneDrkAngl05 chapter 1 . 1/14/2006
i like this! very interseting piece and very well written! keep writing!SarahJane
| disabled account chapter 1 . 1/10/2006
I'm not sure if I quite agree with the author's note, but I love the poem. What struck me in particular was the literal/figurative references made in the seventh line to marriage rings - i.e. "tighten her worth on the world" - the thoughts here are well-formulated and cleverly put to use. Reading your profile - I must say I'm quite glad that you do not let "convention and conformity rule your life" and were thus able to become one of the most distinguished poets that I have read on this site.
PS. Just a thought - there's a slight grammatical mistake in lines 9-10. "Whimsical names of which she will stamp them with." I think you meant to use only one "with" in this sentence. Again, just a thought. Adieu, Kat
| charisrain chapter 1 . 1/5/2006
My apologies, I put the review for "Nestorian" under "Gold Covered Locket of Fuck-Ups..." so I guess I'll comment on Gold Locket here?
Was the 'Call me slut like Carol' line suppOSED to make me laugh and cry and feel ashamed to be a boy ALL at the same time?
Nice job, it's a heart-breaking and understandable read - without coming across as overly annoying/whiny/angsty.
I felt the helplessness and stubbornness described while I read it, and it was interesting to remember those early teen years breakups. The first and hardest ones if you ask me.
| shinco chapter 1 . 1/4/2006
I don't completely understand what you're saying in this, but I THINK I know kind of what you're talking about. I guess you do believe that God is your father, eh? No, I'm not Canadian, either, lol I'm American too. KENTUCKY! WHOOH! lol Are you saying that you think women are better than men and that men are all stupid? I'm not entirely sure, and I don't want to jump to conclusions. So, could you please e-mail me at and explain? You don't have to, I'd just like to know, lol I wouldn't blame you if you didn't considering that I pretty much lied to you saying that I would read some of your stuff and I waited this long to do it. :( WEll, anyway, this was really good, liked the imagery! Keep writin', you're doin' great!
| Raspberry Twirl chapter 1 . 1/2/2006
this is so so strong, soaked in a faith that originated before all others. I love it. Though it may not speak the mind of most women, i'm sure it speaks somewhere in their souls. This is truly filled with spirit. Thanks for sharing, thank you, thank you, thank you. - raspberry twirl
| Hate In The Form Of Passion chapter 1 . 1/2/2006
Little girl with her
baby doll can’t make love to make a
baby until they put a circle around her.
I loved how you worded it with expectation. (Does that even make any sense?) That it makes you think before you read.
It is my sin to believe that I am just
as good as any God; if not better that
I may breed a new one.
That was a really strong comment and I'm suprised that a lot of evangelical Christians haven't started an arguement with you over that. But because it sounded so arrogant I loved it.
| goddessofmoondreams chapter 1 . 12/31/2005
incredible, and so truthful
| marshbar960 chapter 1 . 12/31/2005
i don't know what nestorian is but this poem possesses power. thanks for sharing and keep writing!
p.s. God loves you and so do I!
| KwazyKandyPie chapter 1 . 12/31/2005
very unique. your poems are always like that. simply excellent.-kwazykandypie AKA Kelly Ann-
| in theory chapter 1 . 12/30/2005
Your voice is undeniable here, so smooth and there's a suggestion of satire. I love it. With a few dozen lines of prose you address something you believe in but with an artistic slant, it's gorgeous and at the same time, groundbreaking.
| Chandra-Moon chapter 1 . 12/30/2005
Very powerful, all of it. "My flesh is made from fire and starlight by the thin stretches of my fathers/bony hands". Beautiful line. Along with "women forced to kiss with rust on their lips."
Also, "if not better that I may breed a new one" was quite a powerful ending.
This is feministic, and seems to be about so many things. About sex before marriage-how that is considered sinful, yet is ok when given such a silly thing, a ring. About nestorianism (which I don't pretend to understand, I never heard the word before this poem). About how being a woman can be both holy and sinful-forget what the father says.
I liked this; even though i'm not sure I understood this, there was such a sense of power in it. Good job.
| a lonely september chapter 1 . 12/30/2005
beautiful. i love how you took what you believed into a poem; i can't do things like that, i just dont have that talent.