Reviews for You Should Be Shot
FreekyDisaster18 chapter 1 . 3/24/2014
Hey! I'm here to share with you that this poem has been added to the Poetry category over on A Drop of Romeo :)

Here's the Review:

"Helen Thinks: The first thing that jumped out at me about "You Should be Shot" by I call it laughable is the almost gritty edge to the prose that the author has chosen. Despite still being a poem that has a romantic undertone to it, the rawness towards the emotions portrayed seen to remind the reader of how awkward a time it is to have feelings for someone at high school. There's chemistry there but at the same time there's the sickening, confusing feeling of is this right? Through the use of bending literary rules like using the symbol '&' in text and by putting short sentences in parenthesis, the author creates a layout that just adds to the rawness that they are trying to put across. It makes the sentence come to a standstill, almost as if the narrator is having a little afterthought in their head about the situation and it just provides another glimpse into the confusion of a teenage mind. With beautiful yet almost gritty prose, a killer last line and stunning layout, "You Should be Shot" is a bittersweet read."

Keep writing,

Helen xo
PeanutButterKn1fe chapter 1 . 10/31/2009
That was made me laugh a lot...

and I loved it :)
stephanie grady chapter 1 . 6/13/2009
i love this.

the beginning of it is some what filled with loathe and despise, while at the same time desperate and clingy.

then at the end, the last line, is sort of comedic. changing the tone to a somewhat light one.
luv me like no other chapter 1 . 10/16/2007
I like this a lot, it's really creative.
tearitrightup chapter 1 . 9/24/2006
woow. this is good
zakei chapter 1 . 3/24/2006
. omg so funny. hahahhahahahah. i love you man. *hugs**hands you some other random snack thats edible* remember to exercise kay! i know it reads like SHIT but i LIVE to give you this feeling. LOL. nah. but the phrase is just very funny. very very funny. dont die okay!
The Big Pimpin Pimple chapter 1 . 2/4/2006
I luv the ending it was very ironic, it kinda reminds of those weird riddle games my teacher makes us play in English, there was one about how a lady shot a prized turkey and no one did anything...but I think u know how she shot the turkey (though my dumb self had to be told why no one did anything)

...ne way sorry for gettin off subject it was really good poem...love the use of irony
MyMomSaysImSpecial chapter 1 . 1/30/2006
I think this would be an interesting story.

I love your poetry and short stories by the way. Awesomely-goodness.

I love your pennames btw. So fun.
BeccaDd chapter 1 . 1/21/2006
Teehee very good i love it! _~ last line made me giggle
myno chapter 1 . 1/21/2006
such a fascinating and well-handled format.
poetic abortion chapter 1 . 1/15/2006
the ending is orgasmic(ly) lovely. iLOVEitsomuch.

~* noelle
Margot Tenenbaum chapter 1 . 1/15/2006
i love this and i'm adding it to my favs!
demon chapter 1 . 1/14/2006
I only liked the last line.
none of burt's beeswax chapter 1 . 1/14/2006
ooh, i really like this. especially the ending line 'cause it made me laugh. i love the first stanza and the line "& instead of developing pictures we develped a new way to communicate without words but with our bodies." the third stanza seems a little out-of-place, and i wasn't really sure how it connected with the rest of the poem.
Bananas in a Blender chapter 1 . 1/14/2006
Written very well. The format of the poem really gives it flavor.

Not exactly sweet, but not entirely bitter either. Bittersweet.

Nice, very nice.
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