Reviews for The Sinner's Bride
THis doesn't even exist chapter 16 . 6/8/2009
OMG! that was really good.

I mean...

I wish it were longer, and we got more time to get to know the characters. And them getting together was too fast...

I wish the whole thing was like 200,0 words with lots of detail.

But I love the concept. and the way you wrote damien. Although it wasn't super in depth he is still amazing.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading it, so much I'm just really upset there isn't more.

if that makes any sense

~Shawnden
Narq chapter 15 . 5/7/2009
This was a good story, nice in plot and so on, but I do think you could have done better. You could have added a lot more detail and not skipped a lot of the story. Otherwise, this is really good.
Narq chapter 7 . 5/7/2009
Ahh! cliffy~
Narq chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
Haha, that scene was wonderful! and it was funny too, a great way to break the atmosphere of the kissing!
Narq chapter 2 . 5/7/2009
He's cute i suppose
Narq chapter 1 . 5/7/2009
interesting, really
Nadeshiko95 chapter 4 . 4/26/2009
LOL, i thought this would be one of those cold son of the demon, arraged to marry a mortal becuase of his father or something. Then they start falling in love, heck he's actually really sweet but a drugee o.0
clairey chapter 16 . 4/8/2009
I absolutley loved that story..especially when written from Demions p.o.v...it was so funny :D
MoonlitMaiden chapter 1 . 4/4/2009
Great chapter.

I love some of your lines, they are completely unexpected. The cat claws line was perfect, how it all had references to cats such as 'litter' and 'hair'. I love it. :3

This is a great story, very good detailing.

~MoonlitMaiden~
AJS chapter 15 . 3/25/2009
I liked the ending. I think your story improved a lot if you compare the beginning to the end. However, I think for like the first 2/3 of your fic, it was kind of weird, and a lot of the time I found myself asking why am I reading this? Just because Demion's character seemed a little OOC. I guess it's wrong of me to say that, since you're the one who dictates what Damion's character is and is not, but he just seemed really childish and immature and like a really bad influence on Eris. I also didn't like how Eris never found out that he cheated on her, and their whole relationship seemed pretty one-sided. When they were parting for a year, only she agreed not to flirt with, kiss, or touch other guys, whereas there was no standard like that for him, since he would probably violate it anyways by having sex with whoever. It just seemed like there was a double standard in their relationship, and Eris didn't even stop twice (or once) to think about it. I mean, I get that he's the devil's son, but so what, she's going to be with him for the rest of his life, shouldn't he be willing to sacrifice at least something for her?

I guess that was the main thing that pissed me off. He just seemed a little wacked in the head at times too. Also, why were there so many gay people in this story? Not that I have anything against it, but it just felt like 2 out of every 3 people we met were gay, and it was just kind of abnormal. Umm I think that's it. The ending was a lot better than the beginning. I guess I just felt like your characters acted more... realistic and serious, maybe. And I came to like Demion & Eris together anyways. :) Just cuz he pretty much adores her (aside from the cheating on her which he doesn't consider cheating on her...)

Good luck with your rewrite!

- Alyssa
streetshinobi101 chapter 16 . 3/19/2009
I enjoyed reading this story a lot! It made me cry near the end of it. Eris and Demion's relationship developed over time and thorougly. Great job!
Haley Jean chapter 2 . 2/24/2009
OMIGAWD. I think I've been waiting for this revamp for about forever & a day, but it's definitely well-worth it. Thankyouthankyou! In a way it was sort of surprising. I decided to reread this & BAM! Chap2 is revised. I seriously thought you gave up on rewriting this story. Heh, / Anyway...

I liked how you made Tess actually care for Eris this time around, you know, the incident when she gave her soup. It's nice that you have some foreshadowing taking place this time around. Maybe we'll meet her estranged brother sooner? ( Plus, you put more Demion in here, no one can hate that. xD

I don't mean to be an annoyance about things like this, but when you wrote, “No, I know for a very fact that you love.."

You probably meant, "Now, I know..." right?

But as soon as the moment happened it was over, disrupted by his voice: “What shade of green exactly is your favorite?”

Another option would be: But as soon as the moment happened it passed, and his voice disrupted the silence, "What shade of green exactly is your favorite?"

Eek! This review is getting long, but thank you for the long-awaited update & hopefully more to come? O:)
L'Archange chapter 16 . 2/12/2009
So, I stayed up till one in the morning reading this... thanks a bunch - I have you to blame for being tired :D

Your story rocked :) I really enjoyed it - thanks for writing/posting it :)

L'Archange
My World Of Indulgence chapter 4 . 2/7/2009
haha. wow. im not sure whether i like this part of demion. it amused me at moments, idk im a sick individual who kept thinking " ." throughout the whole thing. lolz. i actually rly like this story so far. i thought POV change was placed perfectly and made it more interesting. wonderful job so far. :)
Genato chapter 15 . 1/30/2009
i think it would be better if you gave the your characters more.. character and personality, i guess? like, they should me more than shallow. and stuff shouldn't be too easy. like there should be more problems. but great plot. nice fic overall.
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