|Reviews for menage a trois|
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 3/17/2006
body language is louder then words...than
i love the descriptions of the boy at the end & the line about things being said & done
| apple of my eye chapter 1 . 1/27/2006
i love love love the lines "but the boy I kiss is on sale. Marked down - fifty percent..."
| BJ Worth chapter 1 . 1/25/2006
Once again, beautifully described.
| white-chokolat chapter 1 . 1/25/2006
liked this one too
| Carp chapter 1 . 1/23/2006
I like the way you manipulate the text, especially with "Wired and inspired". The poetry feels more real with the parentheses marks. Because speech doesn't always flow so majestically. It's the interruptions that make it beautiful. :)
| With Rhyme and Reason chapter 1 . 1/23/2006
You have a lot of very interesting (and somewhat disturbing) imagery in this poem. I'm not a huge fan of your free verse style, but I think you carried it off very well, here. The content was a little graphic for my taste, but I felt like the persona was truly INSIDE the poem. She was the one writhing with these two men, grasping for steaming flesh. My favorite part was the part with the Greek and Latin-it's like the situation perverts even two fo the most respectable languages in the world. Because of the tasteful way you handled this poem, you managed to stay on the good side of "taboo." I didn't think I'd like this, but I did.
| Gilee7 chapter 1 . 1/23/2006
-When masculinity kisses masculinity I shutter, loose it, try and hold- I'm wondering if perhaps you meant "shudder" and "lose it" instead.
-on - lip lock - rock hard - bitten - I stare down the freckle on his chin/ and suckle it with my teeth, while the other twists subjectively beneath me - I must say that this is quite some sexy imagery.
-Wired and inspired at midnight - fluctuate - frail strength - screaming nightshade- You can't see this on here, but I point this out because of how your underlined 'red' in both 'wired' and 'inspired.' That was really, really clever of you. Adds even more style to what is a very stylish piece.
-part of you (two). Splash my dry toes around locked doors. Me and my gypsy elegance. The beautiful people, we mock like children underneath accusatory claws. Stray cats- This is like all one line in the poem. Which I think might've been an error. It seems awkward like that. Perhaps a new line at "The beautiful people?"
-Too many thoughts in his head. Too many hands / in my bed.- LOL. That line made me laugh.
And I love how you tie the ending back to the beginning.
I could've very easily pasted every single line of this poem. It was that amazing. The format of it took me back a little bit at the beginning, but once I started reading it, it was no big deal. I like it actually. It adds to it. I haven't read a poem by you in quite awhile (too long!) and I had forgotten how unique you are. You really have your own style. I love the extra little things you did with parenthesis and italics and underlining.
This was a very, very sexy poem. You really do a good job with choosing vivid words that bring along an image. Words like "pulsate" and "oscillate." I started to feel a bit lost toward the second half of the poem when it went from being a sexual poem to a poem with meaning. I really like the fifty percent off line. I wish I understood the meaning behind the "cancerous keyholes" though.
Amazing, amazing poem, as always.
| A Beautiful Nightmare chapter 1 . 1/22/2006
Wow... I mean... WOW! This was so descriptive! I... um... have really nothing to say... it's... I don't know... original? Awesome work!
| gold against the soul chapter 1 . 1/22/2006
I love your origionality, your style, and most of all your words. It's agressive but thoughtful and I admire your conviction. I can't give you a favourite line because each one is a poem in itself. Keep posting, m'dear.
| writerforever chapter 1 . 1/21/2006
An excellent poem. Your poems are so unique and amazing!
| Chandra-Moon chapter 1 . 1/20/2006
Interesting style-I enjoyed the rambling, twisting feel of it. Beautiful.
| Theory Of The 4th Dimension chapter 1 . 1/19/2006
Awesome! this wa really hot. I really enjoyed the flow of this, smmoth and intense. This is something I want to do for sure.
| Kusje chapter 1 . 1/19/2006
are right though, you have your own kind of tune && writing. and i love it.
| poetic abortion chapter 1 . 1/19/2006
i have nothing to say.
"masculanity kissing masculanity"
(oh my god)
| TheQueenOfSpace chapter 1 . 1/19/2006
I've always loved how deep your writing is. This is very nice :-). Keep writing!