|Reviews for The Game|
| kayttea chapter 2 . 3/8/2006
This is really original to me, and it doesn't seem like and movie or book I've heard of.. except maybe Lost but thats only cause they're in a group and maybe Survivor and I despise that show and this is WAY better! Fear of death and clock- very original. Its sad how Jasmine was repeatedly raped. Thats so mean! I can't wait to find out the girl supposed "criminal records". Update soon k!
| kayttea chapter 1 . 3/8/2006
this is really interesting! I like the style you wrote it in and the how you pointed out that we are probably only concerned with the girl and not the narrator. it seems really original to me, I like it a lot!
| ChasingPerfection chapter 2 . 3/8/2006
Do I notice a common element in all of your stories chiquita? It seems to me that all your stories I review read similarly...but I can't quite put my finger on what it is yet. Oh well, it's probably just the mere fact that they're all written by the same person :D Anyway I like this so far, I'm certainly intrigued by it! Um, let's see...I'm pretty sure overwhelm is one word, no hypen (details, eh?). I like the girl's POV...to me she has attitude, she's bold. I like her a lot! She doesn't try to be go all ancient-wise-man on the reader and explain her philosophy about the game, she just lives it. Very nice indeed! :D
| For What Its Worth chapter 2 . 3/6/2006
the rant of tyhe former narrator was exceedingly hilarious. and shocking when at hte very end you decided to tell us she was a criminal. its like a movie i saw, but that was in modern life, sojust tweak thesetting a bit.
| Absynthe Greene chapter 2 . 3/3/2006
A very cool plot, I don't think I've ever seen this done before...
I think you've wonderfully captured a very real, though perhaps denied, part of the human mind, some primal part of us that causes us to push each other to the point of death.
| JaveHarron chapter 1 . 2/23/2006
Brutal setting here. Reminds me of a Japanese movie named Battle Royale where children were told to kill each other until one remained. Two good stories I'd recommend in a similar vein are LeeHarveyKennedy's School Spirit, and "Without Honor or humanity" by a writer I can't remember off the top of my head.
| Sam F chapter 1 . 2/23/2006
Conciseness is your best friend. This is the third work of yours I've read, and since I have time I'll probably do the others in this fashion. Again, though, the descriptions teeter on the edge of overdone; it's allright to sometimes just say 'this girl', not have 'this girl- this annoying little prat', or 'this girl-child'[which, by the way, is repeating yourself; you imply by the word 'girl' that she is a 'child'. Also, later, she appears to be a woman, making both of the points relatively null.]. I would agree with one of your other readers when he suggested Battle Royale, it appears similar to what you're doing here, though somewhat different [the contestants aren't forced to kill eachother, just themselves]. I'd also recommend the Pit and the Pendulum, just for the impending sense of death. I'm a Poe fan. One other thing for now: her stats aren't 'stats' as much as vague characteristics [stats are usually numerical and definite], and isn't stubbornness the MOST important characteristic in a game like this? It seems that your betters are amateurish if they really think stubbornness in a game designed to make people give up and die is a bad , I still want to read more. I like the cliffhanger at the end of the first chapter - what did she do? Why do you mention that she is amazingly flexible?M, more nitpicking: in the last paragraph you say you "don't remember what it is exactly" without mentioning that you're talking about age; that should be fixed somehow. To conclude, I also wonder why the better is talking to us, and how he knows we will not sympathize with him. If we exist in a world seperate we should not know about the game; if we exist in a world that includes this, why would we not stop it? There must be some explanation at hand.I look forward to your edits. And, perhaps, your other reviews [though not reviewing is fine. Heh.]
| Aquafied chapter 2 . 2/19/2006
hahaha. battle what i was going to say, exactly.
amazing, a lot of people know about does have that strong taste of it, but they just played until one person lived. a bit different
| Aquafied chapter 1 . 2/19/2006
ahh, i am so tired but i cannot look away from this genius.
i am reading on
| TwilightReverie chapter 2 . 2/17/2006
*nodds head* i can see where your going with this...actually i cant and thats why i reckon its wiked. The 'fear' stage sounded sick, the chick getting raped repeatively wouldve been pretty pycho tho. But anyways, you do good work and ill be lookin out 4 updates. Oh yeh, just curious, how old is between childhood and womanhood? like 13-14 or 16-17? cheers!
| multiples of six chapter 2 . 2/17/2006
This chapter was worth the wait ) point of view shiftyness, and character development! Woohoo! And the end of the first paragraph was highly amusing. P I just keep thinking.. flexible and stubborn.. where is it going? But I'm sure my questions will be answered. Oh, and the movie I mentioned, I think it was Japanese or something. I have no idea. Anyway.. update soon D
| Lostoyannaya chapter 2 . 2/16/2006
Wow! This is amazingly...you know, it sounds stupid, but as I read this "The Truman Show" is playing in the background and I'm getting the two confused... :p
What can I say? I love it. I love the narrative viewpoint and how both narrators are equally filled with disgust for one another. I love the style of the writing and the words you use. It's amazing.
I'm curious to know what happens next.
| Nehelia Silverlode chapter 1 . 2/14/2006
This in an extremely interesting story! It's an awesome idea. I just found one sentence that was a bit confusing. "You cannot believe the troubles he life is causing mine."The "he" part was what got me. Besides that, it is a great story so far and I look forward to reading more.
| kpnuts chapter 1 . 2/11/2006
It's really good. It makes me want to carry on reading so please carry on writing. It's very original and keeps the reader hooked. Well done!
| Almah chapter 1 . 2/10/2006
Wow, very interesting! Nothing like a morbid and vaguely creepy scenario to form an awesome story around. From what I've read, the circumstances remind me of a graphic novel called Battle Royale, have you read it? The concept is somewhat similar.
Anyway, can't wait to read more. I like the twist about her being a criminal. You have my attention. :-)