Reviews for Act III
Rin chapter 23 . 8/10/2007
I really enjoyed your story. What made it even better for me is that I am from Minnesota and have gone to the U of M so I knew a lot of the place you mentioned. Also I Lived in Comstock for three years. Comstock for life *metal sign*... well maybe not. Anyways keep up your great work.
Gravilove19 chapter 23 . 6/20/2007
aww so sweet i really enjoyed reading this one XD Keep up the good work.
Liz919 chapter 23 . 4/15/2007
It was adorable. And from someone who has serious anxiety issues and panic attacks...thanks for not making Eddie absolutely off the wall. It was nice to read about a character who had realistic issues not OMGPSYCHOWTFBBQ issues that were called by the same names. Everyone like Eddie needs a Max...some of us are lucky enough to find them. It was a great story.
vimaro22 chapter 2 . 4/9/2007
I definitely notice the differences... They're good, though. I'm looking forward to reading the updated versions of the chapters.
Meer der Sterne chapter 23 . 4/6/2007
I absolutly loved your story. My favourite character was Eddie, even if I don't like the name, and his colbat blue eyes. It was neat to watch the struggles of Max with the whole love thing. Even though, with an end like that the pessimist in me thinks they fall apart within a month.

Zoius and the Devil chapter 23 . 4/6/2007
that was one of the most corny, cheesy, and utterly fluffy endings i have ever read.

i loved it.

i'm a gigantic cheeseball myself.

Max was so CUTE! wah! i loved the way he asked, "That's /it/?". it made me laugh. see how much poor Max has suffered, Eddie!

though i suppose Eddie wasn't so bad in this chapter. sure, he was kind of emo, but still-it was cute of him to admit that he was jealous and possesive. i love it when characters unexpectedly turn out like that.

all in all, GREAT FIC! i loved it!

-kon _
Zoius and the Devil chapter 18 . 4/6/2007
damn Eddie. how DARE he make Max cry. bastard.

Zoius and the Devil chapter 14 . 4/6/2007
'Author’s Note: I feel like squealing. This part was so much fun to write! Happy one month anniversary, hehe. Please leave a review?'

heh, i actually DID squeal after reading the little note attatched to the turkey!

Max is just too sweet. and cute. and...wah. he's ADORABLE!

Eddie is still a moody bitch.

but Max...seriously, Max is like my favorite, fictionpress.

Zoius and the Devil chapter 12 . 4/6/2007

Max is trying his best here, and what does Eddie do? he pushes him away. damnit, Eddie, you're such a moody BITCH! it's like he's permanently PMS-ing!

on a less crazy mode, i really liked this line:

'“Really?” Max’s smile bloomed. “Thought of that one myself.”'

i liked the way you said that his smile bloom. it made me think of his smile slowly, gracefully growing, and all around gave the scene a bit of a warm, fuzzy feeling. i started chuckling at how cute Max was.

anyways, yeah. sorry that i'm being so crazy. i just really, really like Max.

Zoius and the Devil chapter 11 . 4/6/2007
usually, i read an entire story and leave a review at the last chapter. but for this one, i'll make an exception. oh, and just so you know, this review is for chapter 10.


i read 10 chapters of this and what happens? Max makes an ass out of himself (AGAIN), that's what!

i SO hate Eddie! he's way to perfect! good-looking, talented, and able to resist the lures of popularity? it all makes him so annoying!

Max, however, is awesome. cute, confused-human, basically. and, yeah, he is good at soccer-but Eddie was THE best performance or whatever. and he thought he did alright. it bothersme.

not that your story isn't good. i just tend to really like certain characters, and really hate others.

so redeem yourself, Max. and stop being such an asshole, Eddie! fall for Max's charm, damn it!

My Chemical Music Box chapter 1 . 3/9/2007
Act I totally rocks and I love it. I've read the whole thing and I don't see why you feel the need to change it. I love it just the way it is.
Finger Dingbat chapter 23 . 3/3/2007
i just.. i ... gahh. i can't even begin to discribe how this story has made me feel. it was like



eddie what are you doing!

no! max!

yay this is going to work ou-what no!




just rip off his cloes and ravish him in the middel of goddamn class is thats what it takes!

so umm... if you did get that, what i'm trying to say is that is was perfect... in the end. i gotta point out that you never saw amazing-soccer-star-hero-guy acutally precating soccer, and same with oh-so-amazing-at-trombone. but thats okay. i'll live.

on of my favrouit parts was the turkey - that made me smile. so keep it up and don't stop writing
Darksushi chapter 23 . 2/20/2007
Your story is so sweet and realistic! I read your fiction in just one day. I couldn't stop myself! Irony isn't it? It took you almost one year to finish this while I take one day to read the whole thing. Anyway, Bravo! I love Max! He's so funny (in his own way) and charming. Glad to know you're making a sequel )
Warped Sanity chapter 1 . 2/16/2007
Yummy story!
jenny chapter 23 . 2/11/2007
Wow. This story just blew me away. I would love to write you a proper review but I'm far too incoherent right now. Right now, all I can articulate is 1) the ending was so perfect and 2) I'm tragically in love with Eric. I swear, once I am more awake, I will write you a better review.

As for a quick critique, it's rather odd that apart from the first game, there weren't any scenes concerning soccer. I'm always hearing about how college sports are especially time consuming with all the practices and meets. Yet soccer seems to fade into the background as an occasional factor of Max's life after he meets Eddie. There doesn't need to be scenes where Max is practicing, but he probably should mention once in a while his obligations to the team.
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