|Reviews for When Jocks Retaliate|
| Guest chapter 15 . 8/6/2016
Characters are all amazing and some of the most unique people I have ever read about. They feel very real and genuine. The plot, however, is a bit uneven and hard to follow. The writing is good, no grammar mistakes or cliché expressions.. but for some reason it's very hard to read. It lacks what some may call "readability". But as everything else is almost fine it only needs some heavy editing.
| 3 chapter 15 . 11/17/2015
I'm assuming you aren't continuing, but I have lots of things to say about this story. It's THE BEST I have ever read. In 2006, I was a pre-teen, and this story just reminds of all the trends in the 2000's, it was like a blast in the past. And a good one too! If you still use this account, I hope you see everyone's good comments, the 737 reviews. I'm actually not angry that you didn't continue, i guess like Dallas, I'm carefree. I hope you're having a nice life
| VBR chapter 15 . 3/26/2015
Alright so you haven't updated since 2008. So I just assume you've abandon the story. Tragic cause I was really into this but hey thats not the reason I'm reviewing right now. I am typing to thank you. To thank you for having Aaron key the car. I saw the oppurtounity and you took it. Hope to get a follow up but I won't stress about it. Really enjoyed reading!
| PelagiaH chapter 15 . 12/22/2014
| Brah chapter 15 . 5/31/2014
Oh my goodness this story is so brilliant. I honestly fell in love with your characters, they're so amazingly hilarious and REAL and genuine and just so stupidly brilliant. I really wish you would finish this story but what you have is more than enough god this is so freaking good it's so refreshing to read something so different from the cliche plot line that so many stories on this site have. Admittedly when I first began to read this story I was put off by the kinda airhead ness that Dallas seemed to be showing, but then I continued to read and I started to see how NOT airhead-y Dallas was. I then I realized he was a total dumbass at times, but a dumbass that just wanted to protect his own and God if that isn't endearing. Al is so perfect she's probably my favorite character and reminds a lot of Luna Lovegood only a lot more saner. And then there's Aaron who's a complete and utter bonehead, but I couldn't help but fall in love with him too. And Chris too, him and Aaron have this really cute love hate bromance that is absolutely adorable and JANIE! I ADORE JANIE! She's sooooooooo cute and brings so much to the story. *deep sigh* this was just so perfect and I'm so sad it's not finished.
| Long Island Iced Tea chapter 1 . 5/13/2014
| Eeek chapter 15 . 12/2/2013
I can't believe you never finished this! You are amazing, I hope you know that! :)
| Batman slayer chapter 15 . 2/27/2013
Most retarded story ever...all this story does is make the hero look like a fool
| Guest chapter 15 . 12/23/2012
AhHHHHHHhH this story is sooo good! Could you pretty please, if you have the time, finish it with just one more chapter? Amazing job so far,regardless. My fav line so far: dallas think "she's a fucking bully"- i like fell over laughing.
| twibbit chapter 15 . 8/19/2012
Lol if you aren't using google maps for everything then I think we live extremely close to each other lololol yeah Sam Houston is a pretty bad school :P
| bells-mannequin chapter 15 . 3/17/2012
I adore this story so unbelievably much. Words cannot describe it.
I mean, wow. I love it to bits and pieces.
And I know, after 4 years of not updating, I don't have that much hope that you'll continue-but I'm really hoping you do. Or at least tell us what you had planned in your genius mind for the rest of the story.
But really continuing the story, that'd be like a dream came true :D
| sunny chapter 15 . 2/22/2012
come back to this. this story is amazing and still funny after all these years..
| Nique13 chapter 15 . 1/11/2012
"I did it," Aaron finally spoke into the thick silence, breathing fast, excitedly. "I did it, I fuckin' did it!"
They said nothing, breathing hard, Christopher craning his neck to look behind at the disappearing Billiard's, a look of uncertain horror across his face.
The silence swelled and Al could feel the resentment growing.
And Aaron suddenly burst into laughter.
"I keyed his car." Aaron said laughing, delirious with glee. "I keyed Jordan's fuckin' car!"
- So funny. I thought he actually jumped Jordan.
| Paul chapter 15 . 5/1/2011
fuckin awesome...finish it..plz.i'm hooked
| Guest chapter 15 . 3/28/2011
Hey this story is pretty chill. Your characters come to gether in this wicked melodic way, personally Al is one of my favorites. But I've got to hand it to you this drama oriented plot you've got going is really cool. You have a unique twist in your writing that sadly most writers (especially the unprofessional kind) don't bother with.
Most stories are cookie cutter and blend into each other after you read them but this one has really stood out. Its one of the few that I'll probably remember by name. Usually I read a lot more out of this world stuff because I can rarely find this type of story original and its a pleasant surprise to find something that doesn't degenerate into a small twisted idea of high school. I gotta say kudos to you.
Its got great elements of writing and you say things from a unique perspective. I especially like how you tell the story focusing on the different characters and letting it all come together without making a 'Prov' or first person view. I absolutely hate it when people do that, its okay in letters and diaries or Prologs but not in full blown stories.
One thing I gotta comment on is sometimes I have a bit of trouble following your dialog and have to go back over it meticulously to get a point but that happened pretty rarely and I am fairly tired so it might be on me. I didn't notice any faux pas in the writing however the mechanics of English isn't my strong point. Your plot and characters are strong and well set and I do understand the elements of writing so I'm not giving you empty complements.