Wow. I love this. This chapter especially. So powerful, and so accurate it made my skin crawl. The other guy waits for me too. I mean...wow. I was a bit confused at first, but about three paragraphs into the first chapter, i was like "oh..." I love that He never lets go, even when you're fighting tooth and nail. I would definitely love to see a finished product published, the entire world needs to hear about a love like this.

Great one-shot.

Then I scream for you, when I can no longer take it...wow. Just wow. I was actually sitting here eating while reading this. But when I read that, it just hit me... hard. I scream out for you. Coming to that point of desparation, I can feel what the speaker is going through. And even further, do I scream out, when I need help? or do I just go with the flow because that's easier?

I don't care how painful or forceful the ripping of the lies has to be... I love the imagery in this story, I love the way you say things and get straight to how it really feels.

This one hit me harder than the other chapter, maybe because I can really relate to this chapter, to messing up, to listening to the wrong words, but I definetly connected with this one.

Powerful.

So, heres the deal. I'm usually not a good reviewer of poetry. But I like this alot, because its not really poetry. I like the free, open kinda form you write this in. It really is you just talking to Him and it comes out so natural. I like this because it's clear how genuine you are in this and how much this means to you, its just...real and thats always a powerful thing. Excellent work on a very important idea...something that needs to be told, hehe.

this is good. It seems very heartfelt, and made all sorts of emotions spring to mind as I read it. It is slightly repetitive, but you use it in a good way. I loved it!

Oh, my god.

First of all, I wanna say, thanks for the reply to my email. As soon as I wrote that, I realised I had nothing to do, so I began to browse some of your writing. As soon as I read this, I fell in love with it, I really did. Unfortunately, the servers on FP must have been down or something last night, because it wouldn't let me review.

I'm so glad it's letting me today.

I read this, and the first thing I did was smile, despite having had quite a bad day. It reminded me so much of the relationship between me and my boyfriend... its kind of an unusual relationship. An internet one. But we love each other so much... and we wanna try and see each other as much as possible... its kind of hard at the moment, though. He doesn't live TOO far away, but we're both in school, doing important exams and stuff...

So, anyway, back to the writing. I seriously could not find one thing wrong with it. At first, I skimmed through it, and then I became so absorbed that I had to read it all the way through. I'm really self conscious... I hate the way I look, yet my boyfriend tells me I'm beautiful... and I actually believe him.

A one-shot that relates to me. I've seen a lot of one-shots on this site, most of them have been depressing, or romantic in a fictional sense, or based on imagery, and stuff like that... but this is one of the best one-shots I've ever seen, just because it seems so personal... almost as if I'm reading your diary when I'm not supposed to o:

I even quoted some of the parts TO my boyfriend, and he was amazed at how someone had written it, and posted it on FP... It's that amazing.

I especially loved the intro at the beginning: "and a copy of this will be read aloud to him." That made it seem even more special.

The only part that confused me a little was the part about love languages. I had to re read it a couple of times to get the hang of it. But even that didn't seem to matter.

Like I said, I loved it. And this review seems a lot longer than I expected it to be o_O; Well... you did it for me, so I'm returning the favour. Only sorry I couldn't give you any sort of constructive criticism on it though.

~ Rayne Logan.

mm beautiful. it's deep and completely personal, not something someone usually finds here. and yes, hun, hang on to him. i don't think you'll find any other guy who's like him - ever. he's ypur prince charming, something some of us have been seeking for through all our troubles. hmm one part of this kinda disturbed me though... betrayed him. ahh. it's probably me who only finds that awkward. meh, in life people make mistakes. i have done a fair share of them myself P anyhoo, i should be getting off. i don't know... ignore my ramblings. they go off on a tangent and them completely jump off topic. keep up the awesome work. hah, your lover should be impressed ;o) byee,

~bubbl3gum

Oh. my. god. I loved it! One of the best one shots about love on this site. Excellent job!

aw!this is so sweet! awesome job!