Right now, I'd really prefer Charlie over Zeke W.

I don't know.. he's turning into an ass and Charlie's turning back from an ass.

And gosh, the drama!

Great work.

I am totally about to read this JUST BECAUSE your summary had a Catherine the Great quote in it. I hope you realize just how awesome this makes you. And if you don't than that's just awful.

As for the fic itself: I'm finding it enjoyable but you should definitely get someone to beta it for you because you have some icky spelling/typo/grammar mistakes which can be a real turn off in any story.

Also, the dialogue is a bit awkward at times. It just reads off as a bit weird, or rather, too forced perhaps. The relationship between Zeke and Sam is nice but you're imposing it onto the reader and making it really touchy without a strong explanation or any backup really as to why they're so bff. I mean, I'm not saying they shouldn't be but if you're going to make them touchy and bff just don't impose it or throw it out the way you do. The dialogue in the first chapter between her and Zeke where he goes all deep and whatnot also irked me. Let's face it: no one does that in real life. And if they do, I've never come in contact with it regardless of how bff you are.

Sorry...I'm sounding all harsh and whatnot aren't I? But to be honest, I like your style in writing and you have great potential but again, the dialogue and relationships are so forced it's unappealing. I loved what you did with Charlie and Zeke though. People always start stories with the guy finding out he's gay but it's established here and not only that, it's established through a previous relationship. Lovely.

Another thing I didn't like though: You're trying to make everything sound deep and reflective or whatever but that's not something you can just write. That's not going to make the story beautiful. What's going to make it beautiful is if you drive your plot, stop making Zeke be emo and quit with the insightful-ness, thanks.

On a happier note: I still want to read on because your narrative aside from the inner monologues of unrealistic is good. You have some witty phrases and some catchy sentences. But seriously, get a beta. Please.

Interesting story, really, I like the character development and the strange things the Zeke's tend to think. Also the changing between Liam and the other Zeke (no, I don't remember his last name right now) is nice. There are some errors in your writing, though - verbs missing etc, and that disturbs me a bit. Not enough to keep me from reading this story, bu enough to disturb me.

But, I still like the plot and everything. Do write more.

Interesting story with one of the most complex twisted plot lines I have ever seen(which is good).

I have one question...why did you make them both named Zeke...I mean its confusing and their name can't even be shortened. And even though its cute and w/e to think of two Zekes together...its still complicated. You could have just as easily made them childhood friends who were separated or just family friends or just two guys meeting b/c of their parents.

very interesting! I don't think I've read a story that started out like that. I hope the Zekes don't get confusing!

whoa. intense. update soon pleze.

WOW! This story is just BRILLIANT! I just read it from the first chapter to the fortieth and I have not had enough! Spectacular plot, profound characterizations and all of the greatness in between... Update SOON!

I would just like to say that i appreciate the update AND the Action League Now reference...I didnt think anyone else remembered 'Kablam!' or any of the old Nick (Rocko, Angry Beavers, etc.)

Dude, this was good, I especially loved, "Hey Lawrence, I’m Belgium. Feel free to dig your trenches near my backpack." Coz I'm a history geek like that...well I'm a bit of an everything geek really. But as good as it was, you really need to work on a lot grammar and expression points in this chapter. There are a couple of phrases that don't quite sit right. Also you have to make sure that you little history adages are a little more clearly linked to what's happening in the story. I know they may seem clear to you, but for ignorant people such as myself who aren't terribly familiar with some of the subject matter, I think you should just spell it out a little more clearly. The only other matter of note is your flashback sequences which should probably be italicised or something. It's really confusing when they're hiding in there, masquerading as normal paragraphs. Zeke2's whole gay/not gay thing also needs a little more clarity. Because he was in love with his girl friend, blatantly came on to her brother, which seemed a little out of character...just that assertiveness, then he comes out to his mother while she's drunk but still manages to be in denial about being gay when he's attracted to Zeke1. So does he or does he not know he's gay?

But seriously. It's great writing. Your ability to sustain yourself over such a long distance is seriously commendable, your references show a seriously great depth of general knowledge and wide reading and all that good stuff...and now I'll shut up before I start sounding too much like an english teacher.

Hey wow this is awesome. I have to say though, I'm getting a little confused with all the pretty boys you're throwing at me! I mean wow! We Zeke, Zeke, Lawrence, Anthony, Charlie...good gravy. I can't wait to find out who gets with who an' all that jazz.

On a more serious note, I love some of your expression. In general this is extremely well written, but then you jut have to go and make a good thing, just that little bit better...like the cloud description was beautiful, as was the star thing at the end. Awesome.

Hi, I've probably reviewed this story before, but it was probably about year ago if I did. I've just re-discovered this and I wanted to say how amazing it is. I love the complexity, the way that you capture the insanity that is the teenaged brain and how you make us really believe in the characters. Zeke B's brilliant, the little devices that you use ( history, quotes) are really interesting.

Holloway x x

-snorts- i used to watch that show all the time when i was younger xD So pyro, how short /did/ you cut hair if you don't mind me asking?

why? now i'm going to have to wait a whole nother chapter to figure out what's up with anthony. -sighs- though this man in the tahoe sort of makes up for it. pretty good chapter, as always, update soon!

Love it... it really IS like you had this planned all along P I do miss Sam, though...

LOVED THIS CHAPPIE!

Can't wait for 41.

:)

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,

Ty

And just when it starts to get clearer...something else happens that's confusing. Gahh... But I guess everything will be explained in the end! I'll just have to be patient... Looking forward to the next chapter! XD