sounds like Zeke(2) should study philosophy instead of psychology. I like this story. I like how you take you're time to develop characters and background and all. Your narrorators have distinct voices too. Good job.

Woo! The more you continue writing this the better it gets. Really the only thing I can think to tell you to help make it better is just the overall plot in the future. Make sure you throw something wild at us just because at this point it feels like the futures of the characters are obvious. Maybe it's not, but I'm just making sure you know it and stuff. Like to explain in better it feels like I've read this story a thousand times before. You know? whatever. I'm not making sense at all. I swear it is only because it's Saturday and I'm not as stupid as I sound. Anywho- this is about your story and not me. SO I love the writing style a lot. You're obviously talented. You have some really good quoteable lines in your stories- you know the kind of ones where people put on their profiles and that kind of stuff? Yeah. You got some. And I love your chapter beginnings with the title and the song lyric. I would say that is my favorite part of the entire story just because it makes it look all pretty and I absolutely /adore/ things like that. Keep up the writing! D

very good, please continue

haha twilight? wow. my friend just finished that book and she loved it! she wants me to read it so bad. its pretty funny. stephanie meyer was in our town this past weekend so my friend got to meet her. she said she had a ton of fun. she bought a shirt that says bite me on the front with a picture of an apple and on the back it says "Official I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN fan club." i guess he is one of the main characters in the book- but i am sure you know that lol. anyways, i do plan on reading it.. eventually, im not really into the vampire thing though. anyways, about ur book! so far so good :) i like it a lot. i just barely got an account on this site and dont have anything on here yet, but i want to put some stuff on. i have a few poems and some ideas in my head for some cool stories. I just started reading this story, so thats why this review is kind of late from when you put this chapter up. anyways, sorry for the long review, and keep writing this cuz i really like this story! :)

A bit shorter then ch. one but still good 're style is something I haven't ever really seen before.I'm seeing a lot of detail going on in you're surroundings and even going in depth to talk about ,continue soon. BTWz,Zeke rocks!

LP

this sounds pretty interesting. can't wait to see how it turns out. there's still some typos and stuff, but good job so far.

Wow! I am liking this! I just read all of it in one go and I'm interested to see where you go with this story. I like the potential three love interests and I can't wait to see hwat happens!

This story is really good so far. A lot different then what I normally read. Though you may want to think about slowing your events down a little, and adding more detail to characters and places. Its always good to give the reader a good visual. I also saw some typo's, if u reread you should see them. I hope to see more soon.