Reviews for Robbery
method acting chapter 1 . 2/22/2006
Your intentions are so clear here, so intense. My heart goes out to you, I assure you. I adore the ending to this as well, though I think that 'um' should be 'em' or something. Just sounded off to me. In any case, your style comes through, but I can't help but be remeinded of...Marten Jansen and abstract artist. His work always seems incomplete to me, but it still leaves you wondering if that's just you or your bais. I mean, it's beautiful, but there are so many connectors that you wonder what the art truely is. I'm not sure if you dig me, but this is not an insult. or a compliment. observation. I see it in a lot of your older works too, work on making them...fuller. More flow. Anyways, I really do like the feel of this piece, very emotional. It's clear to see that. You can really feel it though, how you're feeling when you read this. I can just see someone scribbling over paper, writing this angrily. Which is so good, not only did I feel for your friend and the situation, I felt how you felt. Very well done.
lessons you learn chapter 1 . 2/22/2006
oh wow, this is extremely sad, but very well written, it just draws you in. Nice strong ending, left an amazing impression- really well done. keep it up.
mostly water chapter 1 . 2/22/2006
This is...such a powerful build-up the end leaves you reeling. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
Aella88 chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
What you said in the summary is so sad. id a really good job on this poem.
dress her up in fairytales chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
omg, the summary just attracted me. i can't believe that happened. i'm shaking... it's really nice for you to write a piece about it but really weird how he didn't want her tips.
breezy nostrils chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
wow that is pathetic. it's sad that people lower themselves to that level out of desperation. well conveyed. i especially like the question she has shakily and the reply. nice emotion. keep on writing!
poetic abortion chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
beautiful, terrific. the writing until the last line, which was s comical. lovelovelove.

~* noelle
Carp chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
Straight forward and blatantly truthful. The last two lines are the real punch to the mouth. This is pretty intense. Blessings to your friend, I hope she's ok. Great poem.
Moondog Dozier chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
This conveys so much so quickly. A horrible thing for anyone to have to go through, much less the person in your summary. Very well written.
in theory chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
Oh God my heart goes out to her, and you. That's beyong comprehension, violence, senseless..

Alongside that, I especially liked the wording around the money, old and useless but still the obect of greed and the motivation to terrorise. *sigh*

Keep up the great work, and again, my condolenscences for what they're worth.

sunday night sky chapter 1 . 2/21/2006
omg that is a horrible thing to happen to her - hopes shes ok. anyways, i like this piece. you've managed to convey so much about the atmosphere with such few words, its lovely. great job!
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