|Reviews for Boy|
| strawberry memories chapter 1 . 4/2/2006
that was AMAZING! each and every one of those syllables had their own secret story to tell, or tale to spin. lovely. simply lovely.
| lxpetrik chapter 1 . 3/23/2006
Oh, cute. Who hasn't done that?
You know I think since you SO many short poems, you should put them into one big collection. I like organization, so that;s the way I would go.
| run rabbit run chapter 1 . 3/9/2006
good short sweet and neat...oh dur, thanks for the review but i didn't get what you meant with your comment... sorry... i mean i meant for the 'until's to be apart from the bodies... it's like a breath. guess i should've made the bodies into rambles or something anyway, thanks and i'll leave you alone now... cheers
| ChasingPerfection chapter 1 . 3/8/2006
I like the parenthsis around dreams but I don't understand them around boy...nor do I understand the hypens (just for show?). and I'm sure someone else has pointed this out but as I haven't read the reviews page yet...isn't it "too caught up..."? Otherwise I like this piece, it seems very detached but not aloof - really the way this boy (or at least peple like him) comes across in real life...like he's not being mean, just caught up in his own mind...
| laughter at the funeral chapter 1 . 3/8/2006
i think the poem as a whole is really nice...it's really sweet...i think the second line is better if you say "won't smile when i walk by" instead of the one indicated...it actually flows easier for me in this way...and i think its supposed to be too instead of to in the third line...
| classic violet chapter 1 . 3/6/2006
oh, so beautiful. very beautiful.
| La Gitane chapter 1 . 3/5/2006
I think you mean too, which is fairly crucial in a poem so short! I think this is an interesting take on a haiku - making a fairly uncomplicated structure more complex. Very interesting...
| acrobia chapter 1 . 3/1/2006
Hum, interesting haiku. I think the subject fits the simplicity of a haiku, and the way you present it is clear and sophisticated, clean lines, I would say, in writing p I like the use of parenthesis too, and the last line "too caught up in (dreams)", fits well. Keep up the good work!xo - Acrobia
| Aslan Israel chapter 1 . 3/1/2006
I love the detached feeling... m. lovely.
| Theory Of The 4th Dimension chapter 1 . 3/1/2006
All I can say is, this an creepily too accurate porttrait of myself. And just for that, I'll add this to my favorites!
| mizu no kokoro chapter 1 . 2/28/2006
wow, flashback to two hours ago~ me love at first sight... it was scary~ good poem
| a lonely september chapter 1 . 2/25/2006
is it supposed to be 'Too' caught up in dreams? maybe i'm just too stupid to get it. but it's pretty.
| Moondog Dozier chapter 1 . 2/23/2006
Interesting use of haiku. This conveys so much in just a glimpse. Good work.
| Aquafied chapter 1 . 2/23/2006
, i adore this. it seems that happens a lot.
it reminds me of trying to walk by people and watch them but dont make eye contactor just being off in a dream
| multiples of six chapter 1 . 2/23/2006
I like this... very cute )