Reviews for Web of Lies
GossamerSilverglow chapter 39 . 7/23/2011
Whoa, this was great, but really messed up. To think the group would've been killed had Lynne not saved Jade. If Denny hadn't been ragging on Lynne she would have never realized how she'd changed. Damn. I can't believe Christine felt justified in allowing Carl to attempt a video recording of a girl being raped and then killed. Did the town ever find out the truth about Carl's attempted rape and murder? It's funny how it was Lynne that was the first to be chosen to burn considering she had nothing to do with anything except Christine's grades. Anyhow, great job. Thanks for writing!
wakeyourdreamz chapter 39 . 6/14/2011
Well that was completely fucking amazing!

I was so scared though and I was like "AHHHH NOO!" and all like 'EEEP!" and all "Oh no! Burnt at the stake" and then "Awe...they drifted."

I wish I could write you some long ass review but I just don't even know where to begin. Can I just say you scared the jumping jillickers out of me, this was so it was a sick story but it was just makes you think, you'know? What if this actually happens? O_O or happed? Maybe I should Google 'Formidable Five'

I think Lynn should have explained what happened in the end to Sue, but whatever. And I really am going to miss Denny. He was awesome.

I ESPECIALLY love how you made a point of taking their shoes off. It's kind of like a custom thing for my family and kind of like a rude thing if you don't take them off. But, alot of people I know aren't like I'm like o_O But, that really hit home.


Nepaligirl chapter 39 . 3/19/2011
Hey there,

you've done an excellent job. I thoroughly enjoyed the story. you should definitely get it published. N you mentioned Nepal! I am from Nepal! you must be thinking I am a weirdo but still, you mentioned my country when most people haven't even heard of it. So, thank you...

And best of luck with your writing!
alexis chapter 1 . 1/2/2011
every few months, i'll come back to you and read the story again. i'll never get tired of it! i love the plotline, the characters, the language, everything! it's so perfect! you could make this into a book, you know. i'll be your first buyer. love it! thanks for being such a wonderful, wonderful writer!
Warrior-Princess06 chapter 39 . 12/26/2010
'Woah.! I'm finally done after reading ALL THE CHAPTERS within 3 days.! :)) I really really LOVE IT! I only had a limited hours of sleeping because i spent it by reading this fic..! HEHE! :) It's a good thing that it's Holidays because of Christmas and New year celebration..hehe.! :D Congratulations for this perfectly awesome, wonderful and amazing fic.! :D Thanks for sharing your imagination to us..! :D This fic gave me a mixed made me cried, sad, happy, fantastic, enthusiastic, nervous, scared, afraid and crazy for this fic.! HAHA! I really enjoy reading this.! :D Good Job.! :D

Actually, I really felt that I'm one of the's really suspense and i'm scared to the max..! You're a great author.! :)) You made me felt like I existed in this fic..! Crazy, i know..! HEHE! :))

I love Denny and Lynne..they're such a perfect couple.! :)) Actually, I really like them to ended up from the better start..hehe.! :)) I LOVE THEM! :)) I love Anthony and Eva too..hehe.! :D I started to like Caysee and Brian..hehe! :)) I love most of the characters here except for those bad people like Carl, Christine, Travis, etc.! :))

I love the plot of this fic..very unpredictable, unique, suspense, interesting and exciting.! :D

Anyways, I'm sorry if i didn't review each chapter..maybe if i came here around the time when you still writing this fic.. i will..but i came here in this site around May 2010 and i'm too excited to read the next chapter to leave a yeah.! :)

Belated Merry Christmas and I hope you'll have a Bountiful New Year.! :)) Congrats again and God Bless you.! :D

Until Next time.! Bye! :))
AJS chapter 39 . 12/24/2010
Holy... shit... I don't even know what to say. I'm floored. This is amazing. I just... don't even know what to say.

Okay, well just a few suggestions/things that struck me. I think the story should have ended with Denny coming back home or something and seeing both Lynne and Denny together in their new life. At least just a glimpse of it. I know you kind of summarized it but I felt like it would have made for a better closure. Also I'm curious as to why Eva and Anthony couldn't go back and contact everyone else in the group again, but I'm really happy that you decided to do a scene with them in the end. The other missing link in this story that I never really quite understood is how the Principal got involved in all of the group's blackmailing and schemes. I can see how all the other students got caught up in it once they ruled the school, but how they actually got to the Principal is still something I don't quite understand. The link between the party and the school is a little off.

Other than that though... wow this story is amazing. I like how in the beginning it wasn't dark and yet it all transitioned really well. Like the path that this story took made sense. Nothing seemed out of place and it was all really nicely built in. I guess Julie was one thing that could have been transitioned better, because she didn't seem that crazy to begin with, even though Lynne initially thought she was anyway. Also the relationship between Denny & Lynne developed really quickly. I think it happened sometime on that roof for the first time when they were hanging out. It didn't really make sense that he would open up to her that quickly, but I guess a huge part of no one being able to get that close to Denny is that no one really thought to look past all the rumors, whereas Lynne did. It also must have been pretty hard for an outsider to develop a relationship with any group member since they all seemed so untouchable. It was also kind of sad because after their initial chase and before the whole bet thing came up, there wasn't actually much alone time one-on-one interaction between Denny & Lynne to develop their relationship. It would have been nice to have more of that too, but I guess that group issues also kind of took over the story.

I really liked the whole group dynamic though too. Vincent seemed a little random, like he was a character who didn't really need to be there because I felt like he didn't really add much to the story, but I guess it was nice to have him there too. I also really like how you developed Lynne's character, and all the different things she struggled with and had to deal with. I found it very real, in the whole changing thing and dealing with all that power. I kind of felt like I struggled with her, even if I didn't agree with some of the things she was doing. Probably Caysee's character could have been developed a bit more. I'm sure there was reasoning for her meanstreak and everything. I mean sometimes I felt she was justified, but then again there were also so many things that she did that were unnecessary too. I guess it made sense to me that she and Brian ended up breaking up. It's weird because earlier in the story when I was thinking about the couples, I just kind of thought to myself that they would be the one couple who didn't make it. I mean there were issues there. Brian knew her and accepted her but I don't think he ever really had the backbone needed to stand up to her. It makes me wonder though if they still keep in touch, or if they lost contact too.

I really love Denny & Lynne together, and I loved them together in the beginning even more, but I would have liked to see more of them together. Honestly in the end, I knew they loved each other and the love was there and yet... I feel like it could have been more convincing or something. I mean their actions said it... well I don't know. Maybe there should have been slightly more romance between them toward the end. Like I know the entire plot of the story kind of took priority but it could have had some more romance sprinkled throughout it as well. I'm not really sure if that's even right to say though since there kind of WAS romance sprinkled throughout it. But maybe it was just the small things that I was missing. Like their alone moments spent by the bay window and on the roof hanging. Stuff like that.

Either way though this story... man. It's so ironic how it worked out in the end. That the principal ended up helping them, but only because he was blackmailed again. It's almost like a bittersweet ending too, since you think you're finally getting away from all these lies and everything and yet... in the end, when it all really boils down, it's the blackmail that saves them. Again. Bittersweet. I like it though. It's kind of perfect.

Anyway. I really have to say, even while I was reading this I just knew that this would be one of those stories I wouldn't forget. The ones that just stick with me no matter how many other stories I've read. For the life of me I have no idea why I never sat down to read this story before. I mean I've seen it on so many other peoples' favorites list, I've marked it as to read... but I have no idea why I never actually read it. And why haven't you won a SkoW award for this? Sheesh. It totally deserves one. In a way, like another reviewer said, this kind of reminds me of Tijan's A Whole New Crowd, but really I like the whole group and friendship aspect of this too. I don't know. Like how these 7 kids really bonded over this one secret... and the truth of it all how just one lie led to another until it got so out of hand... and how it's so believable and almost... I mean if you think about it it could happen really easily to high school kids. Not that it does but it's totally believable that they ended up in a situation like this. I just have no idea how they found out so many peoples' secrets that no one else managed to know about.

Anyway I'm probably rambling now. I don't know why. I guess because I feel like once I submit this review, this story is over, and I don't want it to be over, not just yet, I'm not really ready to part with it all. I miss Denny & Lynne already. What a cute couple. What a righteous couple. They totally belong together. I can't believe that other girl lied about Denny raping her. That really pissed me off. And Denny is so... well he's so different from what he was initially made out to be. He's so responsible and kind of like the fatherly figure of their group or something. I don't know. I would say maybe you could have made the different aspects of his personality blend together better, but then when I really think about it nothing really seemed out of character when I was reading it. It's just when I think about the different sides we saw of Denny that it seems a little off. Like is he moody? Is he responsible? Is he righteous? Is he playful? I guess he's all. He's really caring, and sweet, towards Lynne. And nervous and unsure which is so cute too, how he would make her lean in too to kiss (reminds me of Hitch, haha). Yes, I'm definitely going to conclude that I wish I had seen more of them towards the end, or at least in the epilogue like I talked about.

I see you're actually taking a stab at rewriting this story. I just read a few lines of the prologue and I have to say I like how you structured it already. I'm not going to read it until it's finished but I hope at least some of what I said in this review will be helpful to your rewrite. I also think that the summary for this old version is much better and more catchy than the summary for the new version, but that's just my opinion.

I guess what it really boils down to is that I love the plot of this story. I love the friendships going on, as well as the relationships. I love the group. I love that they're all so hellbent on protecting their secret. I love that they're so protective of one another, and all the members of the group. And I'm kind of sad that they didn't all stick together, because it just makes me miss them even more, but I kind of understand it too. They were bound by their lies for years and once that's gone... there's a kind of understanding there, but also a desire to move on from it all. It's really sad that none of them can return to their hometown though. And just all in all, this story is really good and touching, I guess, especially when I think back to the time when they were all hiding in the school in the end. Something about that imagery is very touching.

Anyway, AWESOME job on this story. I absolutely love this story, and the ending too. Or when I say the ending, I just mean how everything turned out. This is really really pure gold. I love it a lot and am so so sad to part with it all too soon. I hope you'll continue to write amazing stories like this one and wish you the best of luck on your rewrite and any other stories as well! I might check out your other story too. In case my message hasn't been clear enough, I'm definitely favoriting this story. I love love LOVE it. Okay and I just realized you actually won 1 SkoW award for this story but I feel like that doesn't do it justice at all and it deserves many more. :) I will definitely be nominating you for the next round, so I'll wish you best of luck on that too.

- Alyssa
Julietish chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
Hi, there. It's Juliet from A Drop of Romeo. Your story has been added to the archive! Here's your raving review:

I don't think any of you quite grasp how much I adore the stories of the higher-uppers. This story is absolutely original and takes you along for an emotional ride. It'll tug at your heartstrings. The chemistry between Denny and Lynne is amazing. Each character had realistic flaws. Bittersweet ending and all, I loved this.


xDoubleU chapter 39 . 12/18/2010
I don't know what to say. I'm not sure what I should say.

This is probably one of the best stories I have ever read. I love it. Sure it had a few typos and all, but it was still so original, and realistic. And I loved how the characters had realistic flaws, they seemed real.

I felt like I was on an emotional ride throughout the story. I like Lynne in the beginning and hated it her in the middle but liked her again at the end. I liked how Lynne felt so real. Your story is amazing.

I loved the chemistry between Denny and Lynne but I at the beginning I thought it was slightly not believable that they would come to like each other so fast. But then you developed their relationship in a way that I adored. And I loved how it was all up and down with them throughout the story until the end.

And I loved how you added that little tidbit of history repeating itself, and how a few of the group members were reading up on the subject to avoid it, and yet at the end the mob were about to do just that; repeat history.

I'm not really sure what I should add. I wonder what happened to Vincent seeing as there was no mention of him in the last chapter, but oh well. I loved a few of the main characters, I loved the story, the plot.. everything was so unique.

So all in all, good job! It was an amazing story and I enjoyed reading it.
mandy96 chapter 24 . 12/10/2010
OH YEAH! Anthony and Lynne broke up! i never thought they were right 4 each other.
Blumenkasten chapter 37 . 11/25/2010
Even though your story is already finished, I want to leave a comment to tell you, that I really loved reading 'web of lies'.

It wasn't something you just read for fun. I thought a lot about it, even when I wasn't reading and that's what characterizes a good story for me.

Thanks a lot )
CallMeAutumn chapter 37 . 11/7/2010
I really love these type stories. The ones like this one, that are so angsty it's almost sickening but it's so juicy that you can't stop reading so you keep going. And the bittersweet-like ending, where not everyone gets the fairytale happyness or ends up scratch-free, but you're still content with it. And it was written so well, too.

The first part of the story had me really hooked; I couldn't wait to find out what the big secret was, or whether or not Denny could be the real deal. And then after that the story just got really captivating! So great job. The only thing else I wanted to mention was the spelling errors in each chapter, but it wasn't overbearing reading them!
rosieroo chapter 39 . 10/7/2010
oh wow! that was such an awesome story - and so original too! I've never read anything like it! How did you come up with such an amazing idea? Don't tell me thats what its like at your school!

I loved the character of Lynne - she was so realistic. Of course, I did get frustrated with her when she went on her power trip, but thats just human nature - of course someone is going to react to be handed that much power. I loved how she reformed herself and stuck to her morals in the end.

Great job!
babyk2278 chapter 37 . 8/25/2010
WOW! I finished reading this a couple days ago, but I just started school so I've been a little busy and not able to leave one of my lengthy reviews! So here it is! I LOVED this story! At first, I thought it was going to be a little weird, I didn't know exactly where it was going. And I'm telling you when Lynne became apart of the group I was PISSED! Then I started to like it... just a little bit. But then Lynne changed out of nowhere, and I hated her. But just for awhile. My favorite character has to be Denny! He's just so... perfectly un-perfect. I adore him, and it irritated me with him and Lynne's relationship. I have to say my least favorite character would have to be Julie, and I think you know why. I also loved how you wrote out Jerred, he was so cute. Having him date Jade, the quiet girl was absolutely perfect. Eva was iffy with me, in the beginning I hated her , I mean really hated the girl and then she became such a sweet girl. She didn't seem to fit into the group, but then again all of them had their own uniqueness that would seem to push them off to not seem to be in the group... Now Caysee and Brian... PISSED ME OFF! The whole story, it was always something and I couldn't stand it! Caysee always had something to say, and never would let anything go if it wasn't reprimanded by her some kind of way. And Brian the little follower... Okay, I'll go all day on them. But now on to you and your writing, FANTASTIC! I liked how everything was very well written. For some reason I really liked the fact that you didn't have Lynne all overboard stuck on her mothers death and had her let it go. Usually in stories the main character isn't over the death in their family in the story and in yours I liked that you did that different. I'm glad you didn't keep her dad the drunk the whole time too. Denny and Lynne's relationship was spectacular! The emotion was there in your writing and you could feel it intensely. I really enjoyed this story, like for real! I sat with my laptop in my bed for two days eating junk reading your story. It always had me over the edge and waiting to see what would happen when I would go to sleep for the night and be left on chapter 14 or so.. SO, I hope I didn't rip your eyes out with my long review, I just thought you deserved it. Very well written. :)

P.S You did a good job with the no cursing thing :)

PM me, or something, I'd like to talk to you!

babyk2278 )
Mare11 chapter 13 . 7/15/2010
omg your story is awesome. Its kind of creepy how so much power and greed can corrupt people.

At one point i actually thought that they would burn the group.

But anyways your are an awesome writer and keep writing
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