Reviews for These Are Not Horns
delicate-death chapter 1 . 7/16/2007
That was a wonderful chapter keep writing. You seem to have a lot of promise.
Phillipea chapter 1 . 1/2/2007
You ought to continue this! It has potential, I was interested. Your sentences were a bit choppy, and some of your paragraphs were a bit too long, but aside from that I found it to be rather interesting.
Shadowhound chapter 1 . 3/10/2006
you have a good idea for the story, but the way you present it is very choppy. try to avoid sentences where you say "she did this, then this, then this." (interchangibly using periods and commas). that was biggest problem with try to make it flow. if you don't know what i mean, read a poem and see how it smoothly connects. your writing doesn't have to be poetry, but it does need the smooth and connected form of poetry so it can flow. i know, i place a lot of emphasis on the flow of a story.

Shadowhound