|Reviews for The Guardians|
| Anya Tempest chapter 16 . 9/10/2007
Before I begin: I am so sorry I've taken so long to reply, and that the review I'm about to give isn't even so long or detailed as to make up for it.
I really liked this chapter, especially the interaction between the guardians. The banter in the hovewrcraft in particular was quite funny. Plus, I loved the Spiderman bit. "You know, I heard of a guy once who got bitten by a spider and..." blah blah lol
It made me grin. So kudos to you.
| searchlight chapter 16 . 9/6/2007
I just realized I hadn't submitted my review to this yet even though I read it like weeks ago! I have been delinquent in my fictionpress duties. Congratulations on another excellent chapter. Fun to read, fun to think about, fun to think about reading. I am so excited to read the next chapter. I'm really liking these new characters (of course the knight is my fav.) and appreciate the cool dinosaur mentions ;) Such a neat idea!
| searchdark chapter 15 . 7/7/2007
Bermuda Triangle? Nice. Never thought of that place as an option to explore. Are the ships/planes downed on purpose then, to keep the island a secret? Almost like a "Lost World" *wink* *wink* The intersting thing? I was like, 'oh, i hope they get to visit there some day'. Again, really liking the police involvment, added a certain funny twist to it too. Who is the mysterious (evil?) stranger? Yet another interesting twist. And did I hear mention of a possible apatosaurus? YES!
| Anya Tempest chapter 15 . 7/7/2007
Sorry I've taken a while - I was away at a youth camp all week.
The idea of Predevia is cool - and I like the fact that the two brothers weren't evil. :)
Too tired to say much more, sorry. Nice update
| Anya Tempest chapter 14 . 6/2/2007
Nice update - I really liked this chapter, for several reasons.
First being that the interactions were again, great. Ryan and Jeff teasing Fire Girl about the english paper, etc.
Secondly, the touches of humour added in, like when enormo picked up the phone and the police chief didn't want to talk to him. That made me grin. Then there was the "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "No... it's definitely a bird."
Forcefield seems to have grown into his role as forceful leader a bit more now too, what with 'dem fightin' words at the end of the chpater there. Huzzah!
| searchlight chapter 14 . 6/1/2007
A couple snags, but they're all subjective anyway. So we'll get those out of the way.
At one point you say it stretched its small limbs, but then you say the beast was gargantuan. Though, I really like that you used the word gargantuan. Extra claps for you.
You wrote: "...a human voice to focus on when receiving direction." I suggest: ...a human voice on which to focus while receiving direction. Just flowed better in my mind.
He kicked the pterodactyl? Bad man. Bad, bad man!
You wrote: "mutated megolomaniac" I suggest "Mutant megolomaniac" Though I liked the alliteration!
It's a bird, it's a planeno, I'm actually fairly sure it's a bird. Hahahaha! COLchuckle out loud. Which is actually pretty hard to get me to do. Though technically, pterodactyls aren't of avian persuasion, but are actually flying reptiles. The only reason I even brought this up is that I hate the whole 'dinosaurs turned into birds' evolutionary argument.
Those suggestions are only thatsuggestions and quite nit-picky at that. However, I always appreciate it when you critique my work :)
I appreciate that you show respect to the police force in your story. "No need to call me sir, when you're the one in uniform..." Something sadly missing from most fiction. I was always taught that they deserved respect and a certain amount of deference. I wasn't even allowed to call them cops when I was younger!
I like the conversation between the Guardians, especially the younger set. Excellent flowseems like a real conversationa sticking point for me much of the time.
Who are those guys? Oh, you and your cliffhangers. So, so mean. You enjoy the taunting, don't you? I know your kind. Sick, just plain wrong in the head, cruel. But I won't hold it against you and will retract that statement if the next chapter comes soon! Haha.
Are there going to be more dinos? Can I request one? An apatosaurus of any kind would be great! Or a leviathon-like creature could be really cool (think plesiosaur). Until the next chap-a-ter.
| Anya Tempest chapter 13 . 5/15/2007
I liked the interaction in this chapter, I felt so sorry for poor Ryan, though. I think it would be funny if Jessica and Max discovered they like each other XD But then it's obvious that she and Force-field have deep affection for one another, so yeah...
anyway, nice update.
| searchlight chapter 13 . 4/16/2007
You had me at 'dinosaur'. Haha. I like the way you've structured this series-so different from other superhero genres. Fantastic action-packing and then quiet interludes of contemplation. Nice. Do you ever feel bad for the mental anguish you make Ryan go through? Poor, poor Ryan. Now, there's a guy that needs a cup of hot cocoa. With marshmallows. And whipped cream for the heartbreak. Good for what ails ya'. Anyway...still enjoying the way you transition between characters/scenes. JeffShadow is always Da Bomb. haven't said that in ten years and hopefully won't for another ten I don't know, I just really like his character. Thanks for addressing Max's actions and feelings about them-makes ME feel better about the whole thing :}
| Anya Tempest chapter 12 . 2/11/2007
Nice - very nice. Just when they think they've defeated the villain oh no! He has yet another trick up his sleeve D
| Mac Attak chapter 3 . 2/9/2007
Its so bad like an 80s action flick. but so awesome, well ill read on
| Mac Attak chapter 2 . 2/9/2007
So far Ive got Iceman, human torch, green lantern, deadpool,and antman.
Good story expect more reviews.
| searchlight chapter 12 . 2/8/2007
Only two suggestions that I would make:
"Such arrogance! Enormo muffled a groan of boredom." I think perhaps another word would more suit the situation than 'boredom', but that's just personal opinion. Maybe perturbation or a synonym?
"Dr. Canem had calmed down somewhat"
I would omit the 'down' in this particular sentence. Other than that-another fabulous chapter to this tale of heroes that are super! See what I did there? I twisted 'super hero' around. Gosh, I amuse myself way too much. Hahahaha. Gonna post Jane Eyre soon-keep a lookout!
the ever present Searchlight
| macpw2 chapter 2 . 2/7/2007
Hey, I just found this story and I have a lot of reading to do but I thought I would review it anyways. I really like it so far, and look forward to reading more. Keep it up and God Bless.
| Anya Tempest chapter 11 . 2/3/2007
Loved the switching between characters at the start - very slick. I also thought that the prisons, especially Titanium Man's experience, had an edge of darkness to them which hasn't appeared in any of your previous chapters - I really liked that.
I agree with searchlight that it might be nice to be taken a little deeper into the characters. Since they've defeated the Masked Menace (For now...mwahahahaha! ...actually, I have no idea whether he's gonna be a recurring bad-guy or not, I just kinda felt like adding that there cause it... sounded...cool?) they have a little bretahing space for some character development. Since they're superheroes, though, and judging from the gripping pace so far, I expect it won't be long until they come up against another pot-hole on the way to justice.
| searchlight chapter 11 . 1/31/2007
Wha-, wha-, what? It's Dr. Canem? You got some 'splainin' to do. I loved how you transitioned between each character's experience in their cells. Very nice. The beginning reminded me a lot of the Pit and the Pendulum. I almost expected him to find a hole in the center of the floor. Hahaha. One thing I would appreciate seeing/reading more of though- in depth character development concerning pasts, inner thoughts, battling of hubris. Of course, I'm a sucker for that in general, so it may just be me. My favorite character is the Shadow BTW. Don't ask me why, but I wouldn't scream an objection if there was more about him in there. :)