Reviews for sandcastle seconds
no.peace.los.angeles chapter 1 . 5/16/2006
Wow, I never fail to be amazed at your work. I'm just grateful to find such amazing writers on this site, b/c there are another handful of writers who write just as amazing work as you, and that blows me away. It inspires me, and that's saying something, not b/c I think I'm such a fantastic writer, but b/c I'm graduating from college with a minor in creative writing and I am still inspired by others like yourself. Awesome. Anyway, on to the poem, lol. I love the imagery in this. It's so vivid and real, and I can see the water washing away the sandcastles. I know it's a metaphor for time, but it still is such a powerful image, and everything works so well. I'm going to run out of room on my favorites list from you and all the other wonderful writers on this site! Keep writing! :)
Kelpylion chapter 1 . 4/24/2006
I love the rhetorical flow of this, most -how there was a very logical sequence to the stanzas, like a structured argument, but it wasn't annoyingly 'leading' because it was buried under other things. The first stanza seemed a bit wordy, but once I got through it I think it set up very well for the images and ideas in the rest of the poem. Definitely liked the clock metaphors, being a bit obsessed by time. The scene of a beach was very clear, too, along with your thoughts.
lackluster chapter 1 . 3/31/2006
i like this; the idea of it is beautiful and the way you worded it is perfect.