Interesting! o While reading it, the scene of a Lord of the Rings battle came into my mind. Creative!

I LOVE the rhythm and the flow of the poem, though I think "They’ve not got long" could be rewritten as "They have not long" (because the tone is a bit different from the rest of the poem). And there should be an apostrophe here: "In soldiers' eyes".

The ending seems to have been added after you finished writing the whole thing, and the atmosphere shifts abruptly-I don't know if you intended that or not. Other than that, great poem! :)

- hl

Wow, moving poem, loved it. You managed to make it rhyme quite nicely.