Reviews for Ilom Original |
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![]() ![]() Really good so far, I can't wait for the next chapter! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Your story is awesome, and as I said earlier today, it's like a colorful or*asm. I love it, well done, keep writing! ) |
![]() ![]() ![]() *Grumbles* I thought I had this story alerted...stupid email not coming to tell me that there was another chapter! Anyway, very very interesting. I can't wait for more! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Ohh, please don't think I care so much about the spelling! I love your story, very much. There are rarely any mistakes; please, don't give it a second thought. I really love the originality of this piece. ~Elenive |
![]() ![]() ![]() i like this story!PLEASE DON'T STOP WRITING. it really good! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow. I just finished reading your previous chapter and a new one appeared. Talk about perfect timing. No problems with it to speak of. Disappointing, I know. I'll try harder next time. I hope to see more soon. Shadowhound |
![]() ![]() ![]() Another interesting chapter. I liked the 'sophisticated' cocktail party. Unfortunately, I have no idea what makes cocktail part sophisticated so I can only assume the people there are doing the right things. Interesting ending. I liked what one of the girls said, "Ceil and Mioi wait for few." Does that mean that Ilom is one of the few that they are waiting for, or that she should hurry? Again, interesting chapter. I hope to see more soon. Shadowhound |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow. I have to say, this is one original work of fiction. And, might I add, that I love it? It's very well written, with only minor spelling errors. I cannot wait until there's more! ~Elenive |
![]() ![]() ![]() Ah... Okay, things are getting a little more clear to me... Hmm... This chapter is quite interesting. I still love your prose, though it has gotten a little more frantic with Ilom's confusion. Oh, which reminds me, it is Ilom, right? Because with the ariel font for Fictionpress, I wasn't sure of the correct spelling of her name. Well, I suppose things will sort themselves out in time, right? Cheers, GryphonFledglingOfSilverWings |
![]() ![]() ![]() Excellent chapter. Honestly, I had a bit of trouble following it because I couldn't remember what was happening in the story. I went back to the previous chapter and skimmed it a bit, and it helped a lot. I don't have any complaints against your writing, just that it took so long for you to update that I forgot what was happening in the story. Shadowhound |
![]() ![]() ![]() Whoa. This was very good. I am a bit confused, but I am pretty sure that that is the general reaction you are going for right now. In the seventh paragraph up from the bottom, you wrote "has" instead of "as" in "Say he is as heavily..." Once again a magnificent job... GryphonFledglingOfSilverWings |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hmm, this is getting to be good and it is only the second chapter. The writing style seems to be very simplistic and really does bring to mind a rather depressed child relating the events which caused her to be so. Very, very excellent. If there was to be one thing for me to pick out as my favorite yet far, it would be the writing style. Wonderful, just wonderful. GryphonFledglingOfSilverWings |
![]() ![]() ![]() Interesting story so far. I like the way you phrase things and describe them. I hope to see more soon. Shadowhound |
![]() ![]() ![]() So far it's very interesting and complex. Can't wait to see where you're going with this. :D |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow, this is original. I like the conversation with the docter, how Ilom is relatively stoic and remains truthfully so. Very interesting start. Great job. GryphonFledglingOfSilverWings |