I love the new characters. I could totally see Brogan getting jealous over Nikolai's closeness to Desya

can't stop reading it :D

i love you're writing style and the way your characters evolve

i have to say, i really like the developement of the characters, at first Nikolai just appeared to be a big jerk but getting to know his family him being a jerk is understandable

and Desya is a little less whiny so i'm liking that (of course he has reason to whine a little what with what has happened to him)

I am curious though, i noticed in the other chapters you say the full name like Modest 'Desya' (Whatever his last name is) instead of just Modest... why?

i think i love and hate this story already

i hate it cuz Nikolai is such a jerk

but i love it because... well too many reasons

must

read

more

:D

Your first person narrative improved immensely. Congrats!

It seemed a bit rushed, all of this, especially the progress of their relationship.

They suddenly kiss each other, cuddle, etc. Isn't Nikolai supposed to be tough? Isn't Modest too whiny around him and behaves like a spoiled lover? Don't tell me it's just morphine at work.

The story so far kept my interest. But it seems illogical to me how Nikolai could press a gun against Modest's head so easily at the beginning of the story, and now is worried if he killed him with the candlestick. It's not so illogical as him admitting it out loud, anyway.

As for the characters themselves and your way of narrating this story, don't take it as an offense, but I think that you are not so good at first person's POV. You had a great idea behind this story, and it would be better if it was in third person's POV. That's how we get to actually see true reasons behind their actions, follow the logic of their behavior, or rather, the lack of it, since they all appear to be insane. The story would be profounder that way. It lacks profundity greatly (if you intended it to be profound anyway). I don't see sequences of characters' development.

I don't know what exactly that reviewer told you regarding one-dimensional characters or something like that, but please don't flame me. This is supposed to be a constructive criticism.

Could you please explain Dasya's behavior in Nikolai's eyes, and Dasya as Dasya; why he's acting all obedient one moment, and completely insolent in another, with his sharp remarks? Isn't he afraid of them all? How can he be so brave one second, and be such a coward another?

I might me rushing with my conclusions since I haven't read the entire story, but don't mind me. :)

Since this is a good piece, I'll continue reading it right away.

Good job so far!

Yaoi-sama

I just spent, like, half an hour looking at Russian criminal tattoos. You really researched a lot for this story. I hadn't realized how much research this required until I tried to look for the meaning of a heart.

This is a really great story! I don't know if I like any of the characters other than Desya, but I love reading this! And all the details make it so much better!

I wonder how Desya will react when he remembers what happened to his head.

So Nikolai threatens to kill one of his friends and practically gets rid of the last ppl Desya has left and all Desya does is ask to take a nap with Nikolai?...i mean i get that Desya likes Nikolai but still it's a bit realistic, especially for someone who just recently lost practically everything

omg! my little bro iis named nikolai! holy shit! i never thought i'd ever see that neame used anywhere other than there and on the vodka bottle.

i really like this story. and since im russian its interesting to see your perceptions of russians and the like.

just one little thing i would like to point out. usually russians spell "Nikolai' with a j at the end. so Nikolaj.

odd i know. but j is like ya or ai in different contexts

Jesus fuck, I'm 1/4 Irish and I fucking HATE these people. Of course, then again, I hate most Irish on principle of being wife-beating alcoholic sonsofbitches.

I think I prefer my German side.

And good God, I hope to all Christ the little shit gets what for. [brogan, that is. i'm very pro-Russian...in just about everything].

-TheOneYouCallWe

Oh my god I loved this story. The ending wasn't what I expected at all. I kind of hate it and love it at the same time.

well the story worked out for me lol. desya and kolya make the best couple ever. they should get an award or some shit yaay.

Well really you're right it was totally wrong of them to think that you would have fully developed you're characters in one chapter. Especially if they are complex characters as you seem to be implying. : p

I love that this has so much Russian culture and names and stuff in it. Its nice to see someone not completely butchering it by stereo typing all Russians as angry alcoholics...though i guess THAT is technically what Kolya is...Lol, but then again he's only half so he doesn't count. I even like the name Modest, mostly becuase Desya actually sounds appropriate. :D