Reviews for Magically Immature
Sevinoss chapter 18 . 1/18/2011
Find the thing that is not right...

Kingdom Hearts, anyone?

Great story though
Kackex chapter 28 . 5/9/2009
Oh yes, I did forget to tell that if Allen was really as nice as you stated in the final part, would'nt the others know? In the start of the book you said he was a real jerk and mean person and everyone knew it. While at the end of the book you said the real Allen was all nice and really truely "prince charming". This conflicts with the story so much, because a person who has always been nice can not be branded always being mean to excuse one's behavior in a book. Also with people, they don't change their true personalities completely under a crisis. I hope this helps you when you rewrite dialouge. In my oppinion it should be that he is that his friends suspect something since he is never a jerk like Mr. Valen. Hope this helps.

Keep on writing, would you kindly.

-Kackex
Kackex chapter 29 . 3/8/2009
Impressive, very Impressive, and Truely Magical. This story proved it was just as good or even better then the first book. Allen's death (the real allen) was quite tragic, but tasteful. The plot twist with Mr. Vallen was utterly surprising (never saw it coming!), which made me grimance at the super nice Allen's death. And No offence his death reminded me of Cedric Diggory's death; with the one shot spell death thing and all. The death of the Evil witch was very chessy and anticlimatic, when the only thing that stopped her was a very big griffion taking a quick bite out of her head. Marten and the others seem to hold some mysterious plot of not telling Katrina stuff about her past; can't wait for it to unfold in the next book. Tait's illness was genuis; The character development of Tait and Melody were skimpped off and not so well done. Surprise animal summoning spells and Dream sequences are terribly overused. (Chapter 14-17 are prime examples of a somewhat not needed dream sequence.) The relationship between Marten and Katrina was amuseing at first, until I started wanting them to be together; Tait's and Melody's relationship seemed cute and a bit deviant. Your discriptions was well done, except for the stupid flying mustashes (sorry for snide comment; just thought they were unnescessary.)You put things in the story that were unnescessary, and distracted the reader at times prime examples are the stupid flying mustaches, picture incident of looking alike and... Well I think those are the only two(I'm sorry... those mustashes are just so... peavy). The discriptions and parts that revaled Katrina's feelings, emotions, and thoughts about the given situatuion was well was also well done and background story proves to be unfolding quite nicely. The fact her parents are so lenient surprises me; that's just me. I fell in love with the characters, you just need to work on character development. Also I can't wait till you finish the next story so...

Keep on Writing, Would You kindly.

- Kackex
Kackex chapter 11 . 2/28/2009
This story so far is just as good(or even better)as the last.

I've just finished chapter 11, the exposistion of the story, I think... Allen and Marten's fighting and bickering was very amusing and great. Katrina has seemed to be more sarcastic then usual. Also the RISS that Tait has is very creative and innovative, something that I could'nt make in a hundred years. The relationship with Melody and Tait was sad, yet realistic(besides the magic). And the ritual was inventive along with "the land of tales", and Allen being "prince charming". The Motif of the story so far has been ranging from comidic, Serious, adventrous, and romantic. Other comments such as “Does the Cheshire Cat remind anyone else of an old, fat, man that wants to rape teen girls?”, “Welcome to the land of clichés, fairy tales and stupidity” and “She is a little too big to be a cat.” were hilarious. This seems to be a good story for young adults and the charater development was well done for one so young. I just say keep on writing on your MAIT, would you kindly.

- Kackex
The Escapist chapter 29 . 6/22/2007
You're story was amazing! I loved it. This was a great ending. I can't wait for the next book. I'll be waiting for your next update!
Kwote chapter 29 . 6/16/2007
Wow. A simply magical chapter P. I love your writing, and I can't wait for the next story _. Aww, Avalanche is soo cute haha. This had a great ending, and will the next story take place a few months after or just a little after Christmas? Well, thanks for updating, again it was an amazing story. Have a sweet summer, a great time in Costa Rica, and a shaweet time writing Magically Insane 3.

Skort
nolongeraround chapter 29 . 6/16/2007
That was a sad ending. Though the very end was true. We all do whine and complain about things if they don't go our way. I'll be keeping an eye out for your next story. It was a great story.

(v)

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(.• (.• .• .•• Disenchanted Words
nolongeraround chapter 28 . 6/13/2007
Wow, I'm already here! It's so good. It's sad that it's the last chapter. But on the bright side, it's not the end. I'll be looking forward to more!

(v)

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(.• (.• .• .•• Disenchanted Words
nolongeraround chapter 16 . 6/13/2007
That was so funny! I loved it. He was Belle!

Tres Bien! I really enjoy this story.

(v)

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Kwote chapter 28 . 5/11/2007
Wot, awesome chapter! But...it was sad at the same time. Yeah, I did sorta know that Allen was gonna die, but it was just sad to read. I also loove this: "Kalista had swooped behind the queen and, without hesitating, bit off her head." I actually laughed at that ;). Awesome job with the chapter, can't wait for the last one...and I can't wait for the 3rd story!

See ya,

Scott
The Escapist chapter 28 . 5/10/2007
Oh good chapter. Sad and interesting at the same time. One more chapter...Ahh! I guess it has to end some time.

Kier Haliana
Kwote chapter 27 . 5/6/2007
Woot, yet another great chapter. Good job with including all of the movie and fairy-tale charactesr, it makes it even more entertaining. I love your work, can't wait for more, and I wonder who screamed? Aww, Lupie is cool, you should have a spin-off story with him, like dating back to a long time ago when he protected Katrina's ancestors. Welp, can't wait for more, have a good week and don't eat too many sugar-covered bug ears :o.

Oh, and the SAT was ok. Thanks yous!

Adios,

Scott
Efreisone chapter 27 . 5/6/2007
Haha, but you know guys are always up for a chase... ;)

Anyway, just thought he was an interesting character.

Once again, great update. I hadn't seen that twist coming!
The Escapist chapter 27 . 5/6/2007
That was good. Tweety, huh? I probably would have tried to kill it. I hate birds.

Two more chapters! That's sad and exciting all at once.
The Escapist chapter 26 . 4/17/2007
It would be fun to be a griffin. Good Chapter!

So only two more chapters left? Update soon! I want to read them.
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