Reviews for Hips and Hearts
Ruler of The World chapter 4 . 7/4/2006
sorry dear but did your beta go on vacation?Shewas working one of those slave labor minimum wage jobs at the very stand, that year. So we’d stop by before games to keep her company for a few minutes. Upon arriving, however, I noticed that one of the guys from Jacob’s team was at her window, steadily drinking a bottle of water and leaning close to her. He had a flirtatious smile on his face, but from the look on hers, it was anything but welcome. Seeing that she needed saved, I walked up to the booth quickly just in time to hear him ask for her number. this section had a few mixed up tenses, needed semi colons instead of periods and shewas is one word.

sorry i just noticed a bunch of past/present tense problems throughout.

but i still love the plot!
Ruler of The World chapter 3 . 7/4/2006
again with the ellipses my child! other than that... lovely...

the thing about playing catch was a little random? like out of nowhere? sort of awkward for the characters.

still cute! i loved him teaching her how to play! chapter 4 . 7/4/2006
great chapter... those two need to hook up soon... anyways... loved it... update soon...
anacharlie chapter 4 . 7/3/2006
I'm enjoying this! )
Alenor chapter 4 . 7/3/2006
heya, this was a great chappie, can't wait for more. but shouldn't he be realising by now that she has a thing for him once again? i mean, all the obvious signs of nervousness are manifesting in her...can't guys draw conclusions? ahh well, cya later ~ Alenor.
Roman Candles chapter 4 . 7/2/2006
Great story. I love the direction that it's going. Please update!
superheroesarereal chapter 4 . 7/2/2006
hello. ) I like this story. It's cute...the only thing is that I think you typed too fast on some parts and forgot the beginning letters of some words's cool though ) Other than that, not really any complaints and I love this story. teehee keep writing! )
mishu09 chapter 4 . 7/2/2006
HEY GIRL! Good good. I'm actually liking the short chapters. Heh. How many chapters are in this story?
Kayli chapter 4 . 7/2/2006
disorientedwaste chapter 2 . 7/2/2006
You know, an indept story about like, her sister and how she met a man through letters... Set up that way would be really interesting. As this is turning out to be... Uhm. I don't see any serious grammatical/any mistakes but if I do I'll be sure to point it out.
crissy chapter 3 . 7/1/2006
very cute. i like this.
snowtiger13731 chapter 3 . 6/30/2006
look. i took the time to login and post this for you. so you can get a review twice. lol.

i'm [was] on a computer where i cannot seem to open the review box. so i'm sending this to you. maybe i'll remember to post it on fp. [whoot. i did.] maybe. but i figured i might brighten up your day maybe with a review from insignificant me. so here we go:

yes. you caught me. i really am dead. [i remembered to post this, too. i'm a sharp dead.] and you really are talking to a zombie/mummy/ghost/vampire. lol. nah. i'm just at emory all day... 7 to 7. doing... work. it's pretty fun. ionno. ive kinda given up being online. it's SO boring and unproductive. and most of my friends are elsewhere right now. so that's pointless. cuz i talk to a total of like ... 5... 10... people online. regularly, at least. but seriously. i will call you or something one day. because i haven't talked to you in SO long. okay, wow. this isn't really a very good review i suppose. i should start reading... lol.

aww. you softie. this is SO cute. it's stories like yours that make me remember why i want a guy. or why they might not be as vile and horrible and traitorous as i lead myself to believe sometimes. i LOVE your dialogue. it's just SO cute. and there's something floating just beneath the surface. [see, i can still review! wow.] the taboo embarrassing subject is SO... close to home for me. cuz i've been like that with my friend for so long. LOL: "Jacob had gotten this brilliant idea to play catch before. . . and his taunting over how horrible I was had fueled my anger. . . and when I launched the ball the next time, it caught him right between his legs." i love. however. constructive criticism. i hope you don't mind. but the whole... ionno... the way he started saying "let's play catch" and stuff. and her memories of it. admittedly, it's hard to write. but it just seems a little forced here. i can already see some of your reviewers reading this and telling me to shut up because i don't know what i'm talking about. oh well. no offense, though. you know how much i admire you. AH! love the way he whispers in her ear! AH! ... these are my hormonal teenage girlish hopeless romantic notions kicking in. i liked the ending. it was hurried. it was good.

so overall... i like it. i do, however, think that i've never read a story that effectively does the whole transition from best friend to realization of deeper feelings well enough to meet my standards. there are a lot that have come close. you're not bad at the best friend thing. but it just always seems so sudden for me. but maybe the transition is sudden for some peole. what would i know? anyways. i shall post this on fp if i don't forget sometime tonight. i'm sad. i want more. maybe i'll get online one day and beg you for the rest of this hehehe. under the cover that i'm going to give you "feedback" on it. hah. me. give you feedback. hah. i love it. okay, i'm leaving. have a lovely [rain-filled] day. i shall talk to you later!


ps - i love summer julie stories. they make me so happy...
Faded Soulfire chapter 3 . 6/29/2006
JULIE! Of course I would still read/review your stories. I still think you're amazing and I worship your writing abilities...A LOT. And I don't mind the cliche. I'm sure I said this before, but it's nearly impossible to write something to some degree that isn't cliche. I like that you're bravely taking this story out to sea even if it may be pounded by rough waves. From what I've seen, the reaction has been well. And of course because you're Julie! (hahaha. sorry for the long rambling...getting back on track.)

Jacob is so cute. He is definitely holding back on his feelings and so is Emma. I guess it's for good reason. Boys and girls are so stupid when it comes to love. Hell, I can vouch for that. I bet everyone else can, too! But I worry that Emma will do exactly what she did back in 8th grade. Feel that they're too young to fall/be in love. I know there's a saying that love doesn't happen at a specific age. It can happen at any.

And on another note, I'd say don't worry too much on what people think. We're all human and prone to making mistakes/errors. And the problem with ellipses...hell, those little buggers get me all the time. I overuse the dash and ellipses. I think I've been spending too much time on AIM, lol. But I'm so ecstatic to hear that you're working on United States of Addiction. I always liked what it was...essentially about. And take your time with the writing process. Stories at such a serious/mature caliber are very hard to get right the first time...almost impossible. I'm sure that sooner or later it'll come together. All good things take some time. Oh man. Half that sentence was a Count the Stars reference. Oh how I miss them. Oops. I keep getting off topic. But you are amazing and it's great to see you posting again. FP really screws with you after a while. I realized my writing got really sloppy after the first year or two. It's that damn addiction to reviews. They ruin me...but I like writing nontheless. Heh. Oh boy. I think I've rambled on long enough. Sorry. I just have so many pent up thoughts after it being so long since I could really review anything of yours. Keep writing. You're good at it. And as long as you like writing, I'd love to read it. Because if you like it, then I'm sure to love it. Heh. Sorry for being such a cheesy freak. I'm in a good mood.

Update. Soon? Please and thank you.

Andrea chapter 3 . 6/29/2006
great story i love it... up date soon... _erika
Philyra chapter 3 . 6/29/2006
What a cute story! I loved how accurately you portrayed the awkwardness of a middle-school relationship. I can't wait to see where you go with this.
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